I Only Want a Coffee!

I tried to “simply” order a coffee in Oxford while waiting for my group yesterday morning. Goodness this is hard these days, isn’t it?

Would I like an Espresso, an Americano, a Latté, a Cappuccino, a Mocha, a Macchiato or a Caramel-latté?

Would I like that decaf?

Extras shot?

Sugar? What sort of sugar?

Would I like skinny milk? Or Organic? What about Fairtrade or Soya, then?

Now, would I like a muffin with that?

Or a waffle?

Or a “Bilberry Special”, which is fresh? (Is the other stuff all stale or something?)

Biscotti?

Sandwich?

Next week’s lottery numbers? A run down on the five orders of classical architecture? Key to nuclear fission? Free return ticket to Vancouver?

I knew there was a reason I like tea!