The World According to Ian Jelf

Ian Jelf Winter Public Walks Series

2012-01-03T17:20:00.001Z

Happy New Year!

To start the new year, to blow away the cobwebs and to walk off some of the extra pounds gained over Christmas, why not join me for one or two (or more) of this little season of guided walks I’m putting on over the next few weeks?

There are some old favourites like a couple of looks at offbeat and unusual Birmingham to start the New Year. Then there are two walks in the Black Country, in Wednesbury and Bilston. Quite a few people have asked for tours over that way and I’ve chosen these so that people in Birmingham can reach them easily, too, on the Metro. Also in response to requests, I’m running walks in the fascinating Birmingham suburb of Northfield and also in Solihull, which has all sorts of tales up its sleeve.

Last but absolutely not least, some of the most popular walks I did last year were the “Ghosts of Old Birmingham” ones, so building on this I’m pleased to offer “Spectral Sutton Coldfield” as a new spin off. Do watch out for more of these.

Sunday 8 January 2012 Birmingham: the Basics! 11.00am – 1.00pm

Saturday 21 January 2012 Northfield afternoon walk 2.00pm – 4.00pm

Saturday 4 February 2012 Wednesbury 11.00am – 1.00pm

Saturday 11 February 2012 Spectral Sutton Coldfield 7.00pm – 9.00pm

Sunday 12 February 2012 Bilston 11.00am – 1.00pm

Sunday 19 February 2012 Solihull 2.00pm – 4.00pm

To book any of these, simply drop me an e-mail to ian@bluebadge.co.uk then pay (£8 per person) when you turn up. Guests are very welcome and if you know anyone else who’d like to go on my mailing list, do please let me know.

I need a reasonable number of bookings to ensure that these go ahead so I appreciate people booking as much in advance as possible. If you’ve any questions, do just drop me an e-mail to ian@bluebadge.co.uk. Please don't turn up without booking and receiving a confirmation.

Many thanks and best wishes for a happy, peaceful, prosperous and above all healthy 2012.

Ian

Aston Manor Road Transport Museum

2011-12-21T19:25:00.000Z

Some of you will know of the Aston Manor Road Transport Museum, a collection of vintage public transport vehicles, moistly from the West Midlands, which has existed for many years inside the old Witton Tram Depot in Birmingham.

Well, after a long period of uncertainty, issues surrounding the future of the building and the funding of the Museum have come to a head and the collection needs to find a new home. This is a long, involved story and rather sad story which I won't recount here, although you can read more about it here.

Well, through the good offices of Walsall council, a new home has been found in Aldridge (hooray!) but (there's always a "but", isn't there?) the Museum now have the not insignificant logistical problem of actually moving a lot of the exhibits. To make matters worse, the City Council want possession of the site by 28 December 2011; not a good time of year to arrange this, is it? Given the fact that these are in many cases full-sized vehicles and pieces of heavy equipment this really is a major issue and the good folks there have appealed for help. Specifically, they need things like a fork lift capable of lifting up to a ton, a suitable vehicle onto which to lift them and similar help at the Aldridge end.

If anyone reading this knows of someone able to provide help in this manner, could they contact Richard from the Museum on 0121-449 4606 as a matter of some urgency.

And even if you can't passing this message on via the likes of Facebook and Twitter would be appreciated. I can't help personally but am happy to use my online presence to spread the word that help is needed.

If, as they say, you know a man who can, do get in touch with Richard.

Thanks.

Vegetarian Cuisine

2011-12-19T19:57:00.000Z

Mother-in-law is a vegetarian* so obviously needs a separate meal when she joins us for Christmas.

This often involves a bit of experimentation on Louise’s part, so tonight our meal was the “try out” for m-i-l’s Christmas Day lunch.

It was an unusual recipe: courgettes stuffed with ricotta and spinach and topped with pine nuts and roast breadcrumbs. It was very nice but it needed a little "something extra" to bring out the full flavour.

Louise though a bit more cranberry juice. I thought a lamb chop.

* Eats fish. Don't get me started.

Glass Houses, Stones, etc.

2011-12-18T18:39:00.007Z

I was having a rant during my Birmingham Walk today (no, really?!) about the fact that it's now possible to buy stupidly basic things in supermarkets, such a mashed potato, grated cheese and - saints preserve us - ice cubes.

How embarrassed I am, therefore, to have come back to find that Louise is including in tonight's meal.......supermarket bought mashed potato with swede.

(Mind you I do love all root vegetables, the rest of what she's working on sounds delicious: chicken with feta.)

Tropicana: Decision Day

2011-12-13T19:39:00.001Z

While out today, I learned of the decision of North Somerset Council to press ahead with the demolition of the Weston-super-Mare’s old Open Air Swimming Pool, latterly the Tropicana.

This is a subject I’ve been writing and blogging about quite intensely recently, in the apparently vain hope that the structure would have a last-minute reprieve. Well, that hasn’t happened and now it looks as though the place will be demolished.

This is very sad, although today’s events in Liege have rather put subjects like built heritage into perspective. It’s sad and regrettable. It’s not a tragedy.

Even now – eternal optimist that I am – I hope that it won’t happen and that sense will prevail. This is undoubtedly not likely but I won’t give up hope until the demolition gangs move in and the concrete ball swings.

Liege

2011-12-13T19:24:00.003Z

Those of you that knew me back then might remember that I spent a lot of the early nineties tour managing, ie taking British groups on tours around Britain and the Continent.

For complex reasons I won’t go into here, I spent a lot (and I mean a lot) of that time staying with coach groups in the very pleasant Belgian city of Liege. So for that reason, I was especially horrified to hear today’s news story about the shootings and explosions there. I know the Place Saint Lambert, where they took place, very well indeed. In fact I often went there to visit the Christmas Market which is on at the moment.

Of course, hearing about this sort of thing is always upsetting but when you know the place well, when you can imagine exactly where the reporters and witnesses are describing, it has a particularly disturbing resonance.

For most people, tourism in Belgium follows a well trodden and highly touristy path around the Flemish cities of Bruges, Ghent and Brussels. So working in Wallonia, the French-speaking Southern part of the country, was refreshingly different and I can to some extent thank the citizens of Liege for helping me to learn and to speak French, albeit with limitations!

Thus I’ve always had a fondness for the place, despite not having been there now for the best part of a decade I should think.

Chers Liegeois, je pense a vous.

The Decline of the High Street: Expertise in Shops

2011-12-12T16:51:00.004Z

I've always believed - through years of good service and advice - that the place to buy quality photographic equipment was Jessops.

Today, at their (recently refitted) Cherry Street shop in Birmingham, I realised that they have now basically become a cross between Argos, Dixons and Amazon. It was just as well that I knew what I wanted, because the assistant wouldn't have had anything to say to me on the subject, despite his nice Nikon-branded fleece, his fixed smile and the fact that a black & white portrait of him and his many colleagues was hanging in the shop.

I asked, I was told that the product was cheaper online, I was ushered to a computer where he logged on to the Jessops site and he ordered the piece for me. It arrived. It was what I wanted and it was competitively priced. But it was a world away from previous purchases there, where friendly, knowledgeable assistants advised me advice about investing next in a prime lens, about experimenting one day with RAW and lots of other little snippets which have helped me to take better pictures over the years.

I suppose they don't get that many people wanting that sort of in depth service nowadays. They probably sell mostly automated compacts. But it struck me as another nail in the coffin of the traditional High Street.

Weston Tropicana Website

2011-12-11T17:14:00.004Z

A minor development on the Weston-super-Mare Tropicana story. All is not (yet) lost and there is a glimmer of hope.

Perhaps you'd do me the service of just taking s look at this site (and even of signing the petition, although I'm of the view that it will require a lot more than that to make a difference)?

http://www.tropicanawestonsupermare.co.uk/default.aspx

Many thanks.

Some thoughts on this week's UK Veto at the EU.......

2011-12-10T17:48:00.006Z

Well, where do I begin? Is it the end of the EU? (No.) Am I a xenophobic Little Englander? (No.) Are we now in a two speed Europe (Yes and we have been since the early 1980s.) Can I imagine the UK outside the EU? (No.) Will the UK one day leave the EU and concentrate on Commonwealth and wider world trading? (No.)

Had the UK not taken the position it had, then given government policy, a UK referendum on the change to our European Treaty obligations would have been necessary. Had such a referendum taken place, I think it would inevitably resulted in a heavy vote against acceptance.......putting us right into the position we're in now.

People do love to blame "the bankers" for everything, forgetting that "the bankers" concerned are a tiny group of people, whereas the banking industry (which people would apparently like to shaft mercilessly until it ****s off somewhere else) employs thousands of ordinary people whose companies would at the very least contract, throwing more people out of work. Just what we need at the moment.

I really am angry at the hypocrisy of the Labour Party stance in the last 48 hours. Had Gordon Brown or Ed Milliband been Prime Minister and gone off to this summit, do they really expect us to believe that they would have done anything different? And if they had, they'd have been slated for it anyway. They - and all UK politicians, including the remarkably subdued Liberal Democrats - know that tying the UK into a Euro-rescue policy would be both economically dangerous and electorally fatal.

The fact is, "the bankers" didn't cause this particular problem. Nor even did the start of the recession in the US mortgage market cause it. The Euro's problems stem from countries lying their way into the currency and then being allowed to do so by other countries that should have known better but which turned a blind eye in the name of the Great European Ideal.

We're told that we're now "isolated". That might or might not be true. But given that the alternative was doing something we wouldn't want to do, then apparently "not being isolated" means "doing what other countries tell us"?

And as has been said elsewhere, we're actually "isolated" in the same way that a passenger left on the dockside in Southampton was "isolated". When they missed the Titanic.

Help: Structural Engineer Needed!

2011-12-04T10:37:00.000Z

An odd request but using all avenues open to us.......

I need to help find a structural engineer, preferably in the West of England but not essential if there's one elsewhere. (This is tied up with efforts to save the former Open Air Pool - "The Tropicana" - in Weston-s-Mare.)

If you can help or know anyone who can, e-mail me at ian@bluebadge.co.uk and I'll pass on details as necessary.

Thank you.

Mixed News in Weston

2011-11-28T16:30:00.004Z

Nothing like ups and downs, is there?

I began today reading this article:

http://www.thewestonmercury.co.uk/news/town_s_seafront_works_pick_up_award_1_1138720

explaining that the new sea front works in Weston-s-Mare had been given an award. Good. Much needed work and a much deserved award. Makes the town appear to be on the up. All very positive.

Then, this afternoon comes this:

http://www.thewestonmercury.co.uk/news/breaking_news_tropicana_set_for_demolition_1_1139246

For those of you that don't know, the Tropicana was for a few years the name for what had for years been called simply "the bathing pool". This was Weston's vast open air swimming pool (able to accommodate 1,500 bathers at a time), venue for diving displays, beauty pageants (a young Diana Dors came third in a beauty contest here!) and a valuable swimming resource in a resort where the sea can sometimes be a bit far off.

In the eighties it was redeveloped, losing the iconic art deco diving board but gaining a wave machine and some giant fruits down which one could slide into the pool. (It was better than I'm making it sound, honestly!)

Then.......it was closed down. We were told that it was too expensive to run, that it wasn't suited to the British climate (only being able to open for part of the year), although how that differed from the previous sixty years seemed to be a moot point.

Schemes to redevelop the pool came and went but always seemed to involve Something Else: an hotel, a bowling alley, a car park encroaching on the Beach Lawns opposite.

And since the last of those schemes fell through, the place has effectively lain derelict, used to store materials for the seafront enhancement, an ignominious fate for so fine a structure.

All the time, anyone with any sense sense (and there are plenty of those, believe me) has been saying that the answer is a remarkably simple one. Restore it as a pool, with a retractable roof, so that it could be used all year. It's in a good, accessible location and the town's only other swimming pool is well inland, on the edge of a suburban housing estate at Hutton Moor. The Tropicana site is ideal as a pool. To use modern parlance it's a no-brainer.

I've become steadily more concerned by the apparent inability of the local council to understand that any pool scheme here needs to be simple to be affordable. But somehow, I always thought that the pool would, eventually come back. So today's news that demolition is likely has come as something of a bombshell.

If these people allow (nay, cause) the loss of this facility, this monument, they will earn the enmity of all who truly love Weston-s-Mare. I for one will not forgive them. And I shall not be alone.

Ian Jelf Public Walks

2011-11-22T08:20:00.007Z

I have quite a pedigree of doing walking tours in both usual and distinctly "unusual" places.

Well, I've now started running my own public tours in a small way, so that anyone, as long as they book in advance, can join in an Ian Jelf Walk. They're only occasional but they depend on uptake. I keep the groups deliberately small (usually a maximum of 20) and there's usually the
chance of a bit of sightseeing (or even shopping if you're that way inclined !) afterwards.

At the moment, I have three walks on sale, namely:

Sunday 27 November 2011 11am-1pm Birmingham's Jewellery Quarter

Saturday 3 December 2011 11am-1pm Lichfield

Wednesday 7 December 7pm-9pm Ghosts of Old Shrewsbury

All the walks cost £8 per person. Booking in advance but pay on the day.

You can get more details either by sending me an e-mail to ian@bluebadge.co.uk or calling/texting on (07976) 251785. E-mail me and I'll add you to a mailing list, too, so you can be alerted to future walks.

If you'd like more details of what I do and how I work, you can take a look at my website at www.bluebadge.co.uk .

And to help a little business which began in a back bedroom in Warley and grew to run walks from Durham to Winchester, from Taunton to Norwich.....come along and/or spread the word!

Weston's Other Pier

2011-11-16T14:52:00.005Z

Let me tell you the story of a Pier. Not the one you think I’m going to talk about. Another one. And one that needs your help. Stick with me to the end and then follow the links and help to make a difference…….

At the Northern end of Weston-s-Mare, the end that hardly any casual visitor gets to these days, is the town’s other, forgotten Pier.

This isn’t the famous Grand Pier, burned spectacularly in 2008, speedily rebuilt and the subject of other Blog Posts of mine. This is something altogether different, more historic, more interesting and certainly more threatened. This, dear reader, is Birnbeck, or the “Old” Pier.

Birnbeck Pier was designed by a man called Eugenius Birch, the IK Brunel of pier-building who is said to have designed no fewer than 14 around the British coast. None of his designs is what you might call “ordinary” but Birnbeck is even more unusual, for rather than being a simple pier, it is in fact a pier-cum-bridge, linking the mainland with the rocky islet of Birnbeck.

The Bristol Channel is subject to the second highest tidal rise and fall in the world (before you ask, it's the Bay of Fundy in Canada) which makes shipping hazardous and finding landing places useable for much of the day deeply problematic. Birnbeck managed to meet those criteria though and as early as the 1840s there were plans for a suspension bridge linking the island with the mainland so that it could be used as a landing place. These plans were to say the least problematic and in the event, the town had to wait until 1867 before the Pier was eventually opened.

It’s hard for us to imagine now what a major event this was. Flags flew, holidays were proclaimed and Weston took its place among those seaside resorts which “had arrived”.

We tend nowadays to think of piers as pleasure places, for promenading and for amusements and Birnbeck came to have all this. It shouldn’t be forgotten though that they originally had a practical purpose as landing places and in the pre-Severn Bridge Bristol Channel this passenger steamer traffic was significant. The relatively wealthy mining population of South Wales would descend on Weston en masse at weekends and holidays and Birnbeck was their point of arrival. Indeed, a much repeated legend with probably more than a grain of truth was that many day trippers never left the confines of the Pier, it having more than enough to keep them occupied.

For those venturing further afield, horse drawn carriages met the ferries at the Pier and from

1902 Weston’s electric trams arrived. By then, though, railway excursion traffic was becoming important, too and the focus of the town moved ever more Southward, prompting the opening of the Grand Pier in 1904. (The Grand Pier has managed to burn down twice; Birnbeck has managed it only once, on Boxing Day 1897.)

During WWII, Birnbeck was requisitioned by the Admiralty for weapons testing, receiving the designation “HMS Birnbeck”. Their “Directorate of Miscellaneous Weapons Development” carried out some work here concerning the famous “Bouncing Bomb”. As I'm always telling sceptics, there's real history in that mud. (And by the way, it's not mud at all. It's ozone-rich sand. So there.)

After the War it was quickly business as usual and the steamer services of P&A Campbell continued to bring visitors over from South Wales, as well as taking Weston holidaymakers on day trips to other English and Welsh resorts. Indeed, in 1962 Campbell’s bought the Pier. But for a variety of reasons the writing was on the wall.

Perhaps the biggest single factor was the opening of the Severn Bridge in 1966. Steamers continued for a while until the last trip left in 1979. In 1994 the quickly deteriorating Pier was closed and has not reopened since. The RNLI still use it (having made repairs so that their crews can reach one of the few all day launching places in the area) but even they are reported to have gone looking elsewhere for a site, should the worst happen.

New owners, promising much from hotels to apartments on the island have come and gone and competitions for new designs have seen some suggestions which might be charitably described as “different”.

But what actually stands there, albeit crumbling, is a beautiful, elegant Victorian pleasure palace. For the past couple of years or so the wonderful vintage Carters Steam Fair has come to Weston with its brilliant period fairground equipment. And you know what? People, even the iPhone X-Box generation, love the simple old-fashioned stuff, so there’s certainly a market for it. A period looking hotel on the island would seem to have some possibilities, too. After all, it works at Burgh Island.

So where are we? Well the Pier has now been sold (again) to two local businessmen, so let’s await the next plans.

But I told you this long story to try to get you interested in this fabulous bit of surviving (albeit dilapidated) Victorian social history. There is a body of people, interested, caring people, called The Friends of the Old Pier Society. You can check out their new website at

http://www.birnbeck-pier.co.uk

you can buy Stan Terrell's new book, or, as I’ve done, you can join them as a member.

The Grand Pier came back from disaster and a generation ago so did Clevedon Pier, just up the coast (possibly the most beautiful in Britain but that’s another story I must write about one day).

Let’s get the Old Pier back, too and put some life into this lovely bit of Weston.

M Shed

2011-11-16T11:34:00.003Z

Yesterday I was lucky enough to be taken on a behind the scenes guided tour of M Shed, Bristol’s new museum which has gained a great deal of attention lately.

It has a remarkable number of parallels with Birmingham’s Think Tank and I thought it might me interesting to share here my thoughts about the place.

M Shed replaced the old Bristol Industrial Museum, a much loved attraction on the City’s dockside but one which was not particularly well known to visitors. It’s fair to say that the Industrial Museum had become rather “worn”, although this always begs the question of who allowed that to happen in the first place?

It’s no secret that I’m not a fan of Think Tank and miss Birmingham’s old Museum of Science and Industry very much. I don’t like over-reliance on interactive displays, nor a tendency to concentrate only on younger visitors. So it’s fair to say that hearing a lot of buzz-words used in conjunction with M Shed didn’t fill me with optimism.

First impressions were good, though. The new museum takes full advantage of its position on the docks, with huge picture windows giving a truly panoramic view of Bristol’s skyline.

The second Big Thing is that admission is still FREE. There are the usual donations elicited and nominal charges for things like guided tours but otherwise, people can come and go as they wish. Not an easy thing to achieve in this day and age and Bristol City Council is to be applauded for it.

We were led first to the Museum’s store, where objects not currently on display are held. As with most museums, M Shed can only show s relatively small part of its collection at any given time but they’ve approached this “problem” in an innovative way, undertaking to change a proportion of their displays every year. In this way, things don’t languish out of sight for ever and people are given something new to come and explore each year, encouraging return visits. The store was very reminiscent of Birmingham’s Museum Store in Nechells, although it’s much more regularly accessible and the labelling was especially good so that even though things were stacked everywhere, you could easily see what they were.

Then it was into the Museum proper, which is arranged thematically rather than chronologically. As a chronological sort of person, I found this quite difficult, at least at first. But there’s no denying that it’s a though provoking approach and it does encourage looking at things from a different angle. There are three permanent galleries, looking at “Bristol Places”, “Bristol People” and “Bristol Life”.

But this juxtaposing of related but different subjects does work to some extent. For example, in “Bristol People”, the section dealing with the difficult subject of the slave trade is cheek by jowl with sections looking at Bristol’s race relations and the famous (in Bristol anyway) bus boycott in the sixties, prompted by the local bus company refusing to employ non-white staff.

Talking of buses, bus building was a big Bristol industry and they have, as one of the most prominent exhibits in “Bristol Places”, a complete Bristol bus (an FLF Lodekka, for the cognoscenti!). This was used as a sort of “gateway” to exploring transport in the City generally, looking at waterways, roads, housing and factories.

The interactive displays weren’t overdone. Indeed, I found those examining the topography of the City to be the most effective way of telling that story. However, they had loudspeakers, not microphones and when two (or three or four) are being used simultaneously I could imagine it might be jolly difficult to concentrate or even hear your “own”.

The “Bristol Life” gallery was a bit too left of field for me (oh Museum traditionalist that I am!) but might well work in bringing the place to the attention and interest of those who don’t normally visit museums. And in any case, out on the dockside there’s plenty more stuff to keep me enthralled with the cranes (a real feature of the city) boats and dockside railway all integral parts of the Museum.

So, M Shed gets a pretty reasonable thumbs up from me; 7/10 for the statistically minded. Go and take a look.

(While you’re there, by the way, don’t miss out on the City’s many other attractions not least the splendid City Museum & Art Gallery up the hill near the University. This too is free and is felt to compliment M Shed. I rather liked the ethos that “M Shed shows Bristol to the World, while the City Museum & Art Gallery shows the world to Bristol.”)

Why in Birmingham?

2011-11-14T08:12:00.006Z

By and large, I enjoy working in Birmingham very much. Actually, I enjoy it a lot.

It is my birthplace and it has pretty much always been my home. People used to think of it as some post industrial hell-hole but in the last 25 years or so there has been a tremendous transformation in the City Centre that always leaves visitors impressed and to be honest many of the suburbs, attractions and parkland have always been remarkably at odds with the perceived view. To see the greenery spread out, to realise the great things that happened here, to hear its distinctive and lovely accent and to find amazing buildings and stories in unusual places is a wonderful thing.

So it with some sadness that I've realised in recent months that it's becoming harder and harder to work in the place, at least doing City Centre walking tours. Why? Because of all the towns and cities where I do walks, this is virtually the only one where you can be guaranteed "interference" from unusual people while trying to do a walk.

This varies from the mildly abusive (shouting at groups in the distance), through the whole spectrum of "latching on and pulling faces", "telling drunken stories of their own", "people with 'issues' coming and staring in a way that unnerves both me and the group" right up to "threatened physical abuse".

Now whenever I mention this to anyone they always seem to think that this is an issue that would afflict any busy city centre, especially at night. But you know what? I have though I say it myself a pretty wide range of tour destinations and this really is a Birmingham phenomenon. I genuinely have no idea why.

I've thought long and hard about posting this. After all, it's not likely to do either the City nor my business much good if I say these things, is it? But in recent weeks I have not done a single walking tour without some sort of incident of this nature and one day I'll simply pack up the umbrella and go and do this somewhere else. It doesn't happen in London (and I include inner city places like Lambeth and Bethnal Green in this), nor Bristol, nor Reading nor Nottingham. Nor many dozens of other places.

Answers on a postcard please to the great question: "Why in Birmingham?"

Poppies

2011-11-10T08:05:00.005Z

On the face of it, I'm pleased that FIFA has allowed England (and Wales) footballers to wear Poppies on armbands during their games this weekend.

However, there is a nagging doubt inside my mind that this is the right course of action.

There are a set of rules in place designed to ensure complete "neutrality" in the game itself and banning all religious or political symbols. Now I don't believe that the Poppy is a religious symbol, nor a political one. But not everyone might see it that way and I suspect that one day other countries might well want to place symbols which we might not agree with on shirts. Better to ban everything; and stick to it. Keep it simple.

What has happened with leaders writing letters and the press becoming angry, smacks of that haughty attitude which we British are sometimes said to have when dealing with others. I don't think we do usually; but I can see traces of it in this.

The solution of placing them on armbands seems to me a very good (clever, even) compromise. Everyone sticks to the rules, everyone is satisfied.

Remember the phrase "Wear You Poppy With Pride"? I always found that very moving and I genuinely do wear mine with pride, with a sense of remembrance. Nowadays, though, it sometimes seems to me that people wear them because they think they should, rather than because they actually want to. As soon as someone doesn't, everyone descends on them like vultures and people become indignant. (That said, I did refuse a request from the tour manager of an overseas group to remove mine before a tour many years ago to avoid upsetting the clients. I refused but I'm self employed and they hire me, with all my views and foibles and that's the end of the matter.)

So if you haven't already bought one, go and make a donation for your Poppy. It is a visible and potent symbol of loss and remembrance and the funds raised go to a cause that is right and moral, good and commendable.

But when you can't wear it.......you can't. And when that happens, nd your Poppy is still in your coat pocket and your donation is still in RBL's collecting box. Job done.

Ouch!

2011-11-09T09:04:00.002Z

I've just been to the dentist, or more correctly to hygienist.

No problem. My teeth have been fine, as far as I'm aware. Well, they were, until she started scraping around on them with that horrid hook thing they brandish with such gusto. Now they hurt.

Also, she questioned me at length about what I eat. "Do you eat plenty of fruit?" she asked.

"Yes,", I said, feeling distinctly sanctimonious.

"Oh," came the reply "that's the problem. This leaves a lot of acid over the teeth which softens the enamel. That's why they seem so sensitive."

Apparently fruit is okay (d'uh?!) as long as I have it with meals, don't "snack" on it and don't brush for at least an hour afterwards, otherwise I'll spread the acids all over the place.

Isn't life complicated?

I'm off for a haircut later. I wonder if I'll find that I've been brushing my hair incorrectly?

Summer Babies

2011-11-01T11:56:00.005Z

Research has claimed, not for the first time, that summer-born babies struggle at school.

Well, with a birthday on 22 August I feel reasonably well placed to comment on this.

It's a load of drivel.

Although I *hated* school with a passion - and it hated me - I never "struggled".

People are people; some are good at things and some aren't. I'm good at remembering stories and making Lamingtons. I'm bad at football and playing the trumpet.

That's why I'm showing people around Symphony Hall, not playing in it. It also meant I never had to go to school on my birthday.......

Computer Says "No"

2011-11-01T08:20:00.001Z

Have you noticed how – whatever you do nowadays – and expert will ask you to fill in a form or survey which bombards you with various statements and then asks if you “strongly agree, somewhat agree, are ambivalent…….”. Well, you know what I mean. I think it’s called a Box–Jenkins survey, if my memory of studying statistics thirty years ago (ouch) is correct.

I’ve recently had this both at the doctor’s and at the bank and I’ve watched my mother be asked to do the same with regard to pain management at an arthritis clinic.

I suppose any tool to help comprehension is to be applauded. But there’s a slight nagging feeling inside me that this is turning the “professional” in front of me into a slave of the computer. After all, all this data is promptly fed in and then “the computer” says what the next step ought to be. It’s turning highly skilled professionals into data entry clerks. Sooner or later I fear I’m going to have a doctor say to me “Computer says no”.

Maybe the machines are closer to taking over than we thought.

Spud - We - Like

2011-10-31T16:31:00.000Z

Some of you will know that our garden, once an overgrown wilderness, has in the last couple of years been transformed if not exactly into something from Chelsea or Shrewsbury, at least into something neat and inhabitable. Our oft-mentioned "Beach Hut" has also meant that we've spent a lot more time outside than in and we've enjoyed every moment of it.

Not being very horticultural, though, one thing we don't have much of is.......soil. Which was fine by us until we started dabbling in growing potatoes. We invested in a couple, then three and then FIVE of those green polythene bags and some cheap seed potatoes and in no time at all the "patio" (Louise's word; I call it "the yard") resembled a mini-jungle.

Well in the last couple of months we've enjoyed a steady stream of spud which - while not always looking especially wonderful - have certainly tasted so.

This afternoon, we lifted the last of the crop which wasn't bad at all, so we'll have a few weeks of them yet.

Very exciting!

I'm Back!

2011-10-28T13:34:00.004Z

I really ought to get the Blog going again, hadn't I?

It's been over TEN MONTHS since I've posted anything. Always mean to but somehow the rather, er, "busy" year that it's been and the fact that it's often simpler and quicker to post a solitary line or phrase on Facebook (or now Twitter which I've finally embraced as well) has left the poor old Blog somewhat on the sidelines.

So here I am, back. What can I post about?

The launch of a short series of "public walks" (ie ones that anyone can book on, just turn up and pay)?

The fact that it's being a bumper year for Ghost Tours around Hallowe'en?

The pitching of tents in London, Birmingham and Bristol to protest at.......well, er, like , everything and er, the system, like you know?

Or the change to the laws of Royal Succession?

Or the fact that the Queen took a ride on a Melbourne tram the other day?

Or something else?

I'll get back to you. And preferably not in ten months' time.

BBC's "The Nativity" Reviewed

2010-12-23T21:18:00.004Z

Well, I've now watched the last of the four episodes of the BBC/CBC production of "The Nativity".

I thought it was a splendid, straightforward telling of one of the best known stories in human history. It didn't try to be clever, it didn't try to rationalise and significantly it didn't try to preach. It simply - yet with breathtakingly vivid "colour" - told the story pretty much as we've all seen it in a thousand school nativity plays. Great television great storytelling.

Not that the Daily Express seems to think so. They have somehow convinced themselves that it's insulting to Christians, which rather suggests that they've either watched a different production to the one I've seen or else they're being sensationalist for the sake of it. I couldn't possibly comment on which of these possibilities is the more likely.

Although I don't often talk about God, I am indeed a Christian and - despite a few, very few, differences with the Gospels in the narrative here - I wasn't even remotely offended. Indeed, I was distinctly moved by it (not to mention entertained) and pleased to see it go out as part of the Christmastime schedule.

If you wonder what it's all about and you're in the UK it's on the iPlayer. If you're in Canada, it's on CBC Television as a single two hour film tonight at 8.00pm.

What Has Sky Ever Done For Us?

2010-12-22T16:40:00.004Z

Apparently, in an interview with Broadcast Magazine, Jeremy Hunt, the Secretary of State for Culture, Olympics, Media and Sport, described himself as a "cheerleader" for Rupert Murdoch and said that "he has probably done more to create variety and choice in British TV than any other single person".

Now is this an incorrect attribution (BBC, http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-12059950 ) for the record)? Or is Jeremy Hunt occupying some parallel universe where the BBC, Lew Grade and Jeremy Isaacs never existed? Or is he just stark staring bonkers?

Answers on a postcard, please.......

What Has Sky Ever Done For Us?

2010-12-22T16:40:00.003Z

Now is this an incorrect attribution (BBC, http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-12059950 ) for the record)? Or is Jeremy Hunt occupying some parallel universe where the BBC, Lew Grade and Jeremy Irons never existed? Or is he just stark staring bonkers?

Answers on a postcard, please.......

The Hound of the Baskervilles

2010-12-21T22:16:00.002Z

I very much enjoy the Sherlock Holmes stories and at the risk of being populist and predictable(moi?!) my favourite remains The Hound of the Baskervilles.

I’ve just watched the 2002 BBC production which – while being very good in many ways and more-than-usually scary – seemed to have a spectacularly topsy-turvy bit of casting. However did they cast Richard E Grant in the role of Stapleton when he’s the most glaringly-obvious Sherlock Holmes since Jeremy Brett?

Nice to see some splendid Isle of Man scenery doubling for Dartmoor, though!

BBC: The Nativity

2010-12-20T19:30:00.003Z

I've just watched the first episode of the BBC/CBC co production The Nativity.

What a splendid bit of telly. Whatever your views or beliefs, catch it on iPlayer or whatever if you can (and there are three more episodes this week).

It was visually very pleasing (it looked like I was watching a moving version of a Pre-Raphaelite painting) and it dealt with religiously-rooted events in a very stylish and measured way.

Finally, it did what all good books, films or television should do: it moved me. The Annunciation has the hairs standing up on the back of my neck.

Looking forward to the rest now.......

Fact Emulating Fiction

2010-12-16T19:24:00.002Z

Last night we watched the hugely enjoyable film "Love Actually".

Today, I went to get some Christmas presents and emerged heavily laden from the shops to find people carrying Christmas trees and snow coming down in rather large flakes.

For a moment, I thought I was back in the film!

Amassed Junk

2010-12-14T15:34:00.005Z

I've been clearing stuff in preparation for Christmas. Amazing the stuff you find "filed away" in the letter rack and a box here and there. This has so far included:

A plastic disposable camera neither of us recognises
A bus map for the Wirral
A 35mm film canister (goodness knows)
A Bristol Zoological Gardens key ring
A (blank) postcard from Paphos
A 1977 guide to Stonehenge
An "Oxfordshire Ancestors" CD-ROM
A packet of 40 anti-static computer wipes
A copy of "Latin Can Be Fun"

We live in a very strange house. And I wouldn't have it any other way!

Literary Interlude

2010-12-14T10:23:00.000Z

Things have suddenly become very busy. Not just the preparations for Christmas (don't remind me!) but a flurry of bookings for 2011. I think offices across Western Europe are full of people desperately trying to clear their desks before the Christmas break. Still, it's all welcome.

Anyway, in an attempt to relax (something I'm always being told to do) I've decided to force myself to read a classic novel, so I'm tackling Daphne du Maurier's Rebecca.

It's a bit heavy going.......but I'll keep you posted!

Circular Thoughts on Radio

2010-12-13T22:32:00.003Z

As I've said here before, I'm sometimes accused of being a Radio 4 Bore, one of those people who endlessly goes on about what a varied, stimulating thing the BBC's national speech network is. I'm not a "bore" at all. I'm just discerning.

In contrast, I'm not much of a telly person these day (not like in The Golden Age of Television When I Was Young [TM], oh, no.......) but we sat through tonight's Ian Hislop's Age of the Do Gooders on BBC 2. Now at he risk of being simplistic, ithis was BBC Televisoin managing to be BBC Radio 4 with pictures.......

The Age of the Do Gooders reminded at how off the wall telly can be when it's done with a bit of thought and intelligence. (Mind you, having sat through The Apprentice the other evening because it covered tourism, anything else would have seemed stimulating!)

I was interested to see him cover the Victorian illustrator George Cruikshank, whose house I include when I do tours in Camden. It lies at the end of Mornington Crescent, a Tube Station which has its own special place in Radio 4 lore.

And with that circular bit of thinking, I'll take my leave of you again!

Working From Home

2010-12-03T09:07:00.003Z

I'm working from home today. And I when I say that, I really do mean work from home; I've a great pile of preparation to do.

It seems that in this age of electronic communications, for some jobs at least, this is now much easier. There's been a lot of coverage in the last year or so of what the media seem to call "shedworking", ie building an office in a shed at the bottom of the garden and working from there.

Well, we haven't run to that. We've acquired a summer house this year but it's emphatically not connected to anything. It's a refuge from all that.

No, for me working from home means a spare bedroom converted into an office. And that leads me to the subject of this Blog post:

In this weather, having an office just at the bottom of the garden is great in that you don't have to worry about roads, public transport, etc., in this sort of weather.

However, unless these "sheds" are extremely well insulated (!) I think I prefer my former-spare-bedroom-turned-office with a radiator on one wall, thank you very much!

Snow: The End of British Civilization. For a Couple of Days.

2010-11-30T10:03:00.005Z

There's some snow. It's earlier than usual but it is December tomorrow and we've 200 years of tradition of illustrating Christmas with snow scenes, so it's not that amazing.

Yes, some areas have had a lot of it and rural life can be disrupted. But here in the urban West Midlands we have barely enough to cover the ground and even our road, a fairly minor one, has no snow on the carriageway. So it's not the end of the world.

But guess what? There are lists of closed schools and cancelled events everywhere. Why on Earth do we do this in Britain? Are we afraid that if someone hurts themselves, "we" as the organiser of an event or the opener of a school will somehow be liable? And if you want to tell me that the heating is off, that begs the questions *why* is the heating off? Or is it that teachers now all live in barn conversions 40km from where they teach?

Basically, we're all namby-pambies who think that a few centimetres of snow represents the onset of a new ice age.

Get out there. If only to build a snowman!

Morning Thoughts on Australian Politics

2010-11-27T07:36:00.006Z

Ian: If we were in Victoria, instead of me freezing doing a walking tour of Lichfield today, we'd be voting today and enjoying a "Sausage Sizzle".

Louise: What's a "Sausage Sizzle"?

Ian: Apparently, it's a sort of sausage barbecue they have for people queueing to vote.

Louise: What a great idea. But what if you're vegetarian?

Ian: Don't be ridiculous. This is Australia we're talking about.

Winning Friends and Influencing People, Among Australians

2010-11-25T18:01:00.005Z

Ian: So Where in Australia are you from?

Client: Sydney

Ian: Oh great. Loved it there. I always feel a bit of empathy with Sydneysiders, as I come from a second city, too.

Client: We don't tend to think of Sydney as being the second city, really. Canberra is a bit of an artificial place, very small and full of politicians!

Ian: I didn't mean behind Canberra, I meant behind Melbourne.

The conversation ended at that point.......

Just a Reminder that it's still November. Honestly.

2010-11-24T16:45:00.002Z

In the last 48 hours I've seen three houses decorated for Christmas and with their Christmas trees up.

Not commercial premises you understand (ie shops where "Christmas" seems to begin in late August) but ordinary, domestic houses. In November.

Good grief!

Last Chapter

2010-11-23T16:05:00.003Z

In the fading sunlight of the afternoon, we've just sprinkled Bobbie's ashes in her favourite sunbathing corner of the garden.

I penned some words for the occasion.......

We loved to stroke your jet black fur

We loved to hear your contented purr

To tickle your belly or just sit with you

That’s all we ever needed to do

We see you still, just waiting there

To be fussed and teased, on your favourite stair

You came to our lives by accident

But – goodness! – how much to us that meant

We watered, fed and cared each day

But ten times over did you that repay

With your companionship and care

From dawn ‘til night you were always there

No more shall we brush you, nor clip your claws

Nor play with your ears, nor hold your paws

No more can we cradle and comfort you

Though we know we’ll still always want to

So stretch out and rest in everlasting sunshine

Until we see you again in the course of time

Farewell dear friend, evermore to rest

You were our Bobbie…..the very best!

Bobbie

2010-11-16T19:54:00.002Z

Our beloved cat, Bobbie, died very suddenly today.

We never acquired Bobbie; she acquired us, having previously lived with a neighbour. She gradually wedged herself firmly into our affections and became – in all seriousness – part of the family.

She’s been here as long as Louise and I have been together and she’s had several health scares, always fighting through them. She was, despite her small size and delicate nature, a real battler.

She enjoyed simply “being with us”, not necessarily doing anything, not being excessively fussed but just being there, sitting quietly, indoors or out, with us. She wasn’t usually one for playing with cat toys but a long piece of fabric Louise bought in a pet shop in York did become a real favourite.

Like all family members, she had her routines, even if she did have to get used to “parents” who have wildly-variable times for getting up. Be it 4.00am or 8.00am, she was there, at the top of the stairs waiting for morning fuss. Then she would follow down four stairs and stop, with her head through the balustrade, so that she could be fussed from one of us as we arrived in the hall below. Then – and only then – was it time for breakfast.

She was there to provide company for us both when we were down and happiness for us when we weren’t.

When we were away, she too enjoyed going on holiday “to grannie’s” and even when she developed health problems, she was always impeccably behaved for her “Australian friend” (ie the vet!).

I’d rather dwell on Bobbie’s life than her passing, so suffice it to say that it all ended suddenly and painlessly this evening.

Thanks for letting us share your life, Bobbie. You were an integral part of “us” and we’ll miss you!

As Others See Us

2010-11-15T16:55:00.001Z

There is an interesting phrase employed by Robbie Burns in his “Ode to a Louse”: “to see ourselves as others see us”.

Inspired by this, I always keep a look out for coverage of UK affairs in overseas media outlets. One of my favourites is Australia’s ABC, basically the only real rival in terms of quality for the BBC, I’d say.

But their coverage of UK affairs is incredibly, overwhelmingly, scarily, bizarrely dominated by what’s going on in the world of sport. And not just the stuff you’d expect, like cricket and Rugby, but even football, a game Australians don’t really even play that much. You'd think that nothing happened here other than sport.

Don’t take my word for it. Have a look!

Euromania!

2010-11-11T22:35:00.001Z

I've just noticed that Vicky Leandros is opening Birmingham's Frankfurt Christmas Market.

You can't beat a French-speaking Greek who represented Luxembourg in the Eurovision Song Contest and now lives in Germany to open a Christmas Market in England, can you?

Some Work News

2010-11-05T16:24:00.002Z

I’ve a bit of an announcement to make.

Not many people have been aware of this but…….for the last 18 months or so I’ve been studying away and sitting exams to qualify as a Blue Badge guide for the South West of England.

Well, today’s post brought the news that I’ve passed the final one, a bit of news I was hoping for but – shall we say - not confident about.

My new region overlaps a little with places where I’m already qualified (notably Gloucestershire, Salisbury and Stonehenge). But it opens up some places that are very special to me indeed. Briefly it comprises Somerset, Bristol, Gloucestershire, Wiltshire, Dorset, Devon and Cornwall. Some of you will be aware that I’ve been working in some of this area for some time. One of the reasons for taking these exams was to formalise that arrangement somewhat. Thank you to all those who’ve booked me and been on walks in much of this area. Your work and tolerance helped me get to this point and my gratitude is very real. (I even managed to weave subjects like Stonehenge and Australia in to the practicals!)

So here we are.

If you happen to know anyone who would like to book slightly off-the-wall tours in any of these areas, do send them my way!

London Midland's "Great Escape"

2010-10-28T07:45:00.004Z

It's usual for anyone with children or anyone to work in education to complain about the way in which prices for holidays, etc., go up in school holidays. All attempts to explain to them that they don't go "up" in holiday time, they go "down" in term time fall on the deaf ears of those who do not wish to hear. It's also called demand-pull inflation.

So it's unusual to hear of something whereby a special, heavily discounted offer in only available during school holidays.

I'm talking about London Midland's "£10 Great Escape" offer. You download a voucher from their website, present it at the station and can get a full day's travel on their network for £10. bearing in mind that that stretches from London to Liverpool, that can be a very good deal indeed.

The only downside (for us childless ones) is that it causes trains to be packed out with families! :-) Now that can plainly be a Good Thing.......but I do wonder how many of those journeys would have happened anyway (maybe not many, I don't know?) but why don't they try the (occasional) offer in term time, when presumably there are many more empty off-peak seats to fill?

Just a thought.

And overall it really is a good idea. I've now availed myself of it a couple of times and - apart from tiring myself out - can pronounce myself very happy with it!

Bedford

2010-10-28T07:42:00.002Z

Taking advantage of London Midland’s £10 "Great Escape" Rover Ticket offer, I went to (among other places!) Bedford yesterday.

I’d only ever been there once, in the 1980s and that was to look at the ex-London Routemaster buses that the local company put into operation on one route there at the time. Other than that, oh and knowing that it was the birthplace of John Bunyan, that was about it.

Now I pride myself that I can find interest and fascination in the most mundane of places. When you’ve concocted walks around Solihull and Basingstoke, Bethnal Green and Walsall, you learn to “sniff out” interesting stuff.

Well, although I could see some interesting buildings, especially a fine church, Bedford simply defeated me on this score. The walk from the station could be marketed as “The Scruffy Trail” (and some meaningful signs might help!) and even by current standards there was an above-average number of shops to let.

The markets looked large and busy but somehow I just couldn’t warm to the place and I spent an hour less there than I’d intended.

Rare for me that.

Ever Forward

2010-10-25T07:34:00.005Z

On 28 July 2008 the historic pavilion of the Grand Pier at Weston-super-Mare was destroyed in a spectacular fire that made headlines around the world.

The following day on Facebook I wrote:

“If……. they do a good restoration job, it could be in the long run a good thing, raising the profile of [Weston] and allowing it to be better than ever.”

Well, skip forward just over 800 days…….and here we are. After a remarkably quick rebuild (and despite some delays), on Saturday 23 October 2010 Louise and I were lucky enough to be present for the re-opening of the new Grand Pier.

With a new pavilion designed by the Bristol architectural practice of Angus Meek, the Pier is back bigger and arguably better than ever. Yes, I miss the design of the original and part of me wishes that it had been rebuilt as a replica, a la St Kilda, Victoria. However, the new building is considerably larger (same footprint but taller), so there’s more inside, not just rides but bars, restaurants, conference facilities, even marriage rooms! This all makes the Pier a bigger attraction. And – significantly – that makes Weston itself a bigger attraction.

The English seaside has been through some difficult years but is not-so-slowly reinventing itself these days. Even before the era of recession, staycations (ugh!) and carbon footprints, people were re-discovering their “home” seaside. Weston in some ways was poorly-placed to attract “specialist” tourism (as the Isle of Man does with transport and motorcycle racing, Padstow with gastronomy or Southwold with simplicity and nostalgia). But Weston does have some significant things going for it.

It has a splendid beach with firm sands. The famously receding tide frankly means there’s lots of space for everyone! And it’s a lot nicer than Bondi, believe me.

It’s not that far away from major centres of population (day trips from Bristol, the West Midlands and South Wales are easy).

Lying in the shadow of wooded Worlebury Hill, with sublime stone terraces tumbling down towards the bay Weston has a truly magnificent setting. Its only real rival in that department is Torquay (and that’s spoiled a little by too many post-war apartment blocks nowadays).

And the Grand Pier rebuild is just one of a series of improvements. The need for flood defences (that sea does come in!) has been seized to create a much improved new Promenade which is almost finished. The traffic-choked junction opposite the Grand Pier itself is also being transformed, into a new “Pier Square” which will improve the setting no end.

There is a “buzz” in the town at the moment caused by the amount of inward investment.

Yes, there are some “bits” to deal with. The buildings of the central sea front aren’t yet a credit to the town. The Northern end of the Promenade needs some tidying up, especially now that the Royal Pier Hotel is no more and that could go hand-in-hand with the restoration of the “other” Pier, at Birnbeck. And don’t get me started on the Tropicana (the former Open Air Swimming Pool whose fate is easily Weston’s biggest shame).

But the town is on the up. The motto on its coat of arms (borrowed from Birmingham!) is “Ever Forward”. Seldom has it been more appropriate.

"Forward"

2010-10-22T17:54:00.003Z

Some 18 years ago, I started my tourist guiding career working on the open top double decker buses run by the much-missed “Guide Friday” company in Birmingham.

The concept of guided tours of Birmingham was something of a novelty then and the small team that worked on them in that first season was really instilled with a sense of pride and excitement in a City which for too long had been the butt of jokes.

Well, fast forward. Almost by accident, I spend years tour managing all over Europe, qualify as a Blue Badge Guide in the Heart of England and then London and carve a small business for myself doing specialist tours of all sorts of unusual places for more “discerning” clients.

But - among my peers at least – I’ve always been thought of as a “Birmingham Guide”. Despite this, in recent years Birmingham has rather reduced in importance for me and the number of tours I do of it as a proportion of my total work is nowadays quite small.

So this last week has been something of a change for me, as a party of US musicians booked me for five consecutive and identical days entirely in Birmingham for successive groups. Their itinerary was great, too: a coach tour, a City Centre walk, lunch at the Old Joint Stock and afternoon visits to the woefully-unvisited Saint Mary’s Handsworth and the splendidly renovated Aston Hall.

And do you know what? I’ve rediscovered my wonderful, impressive, unequalled home city. People are stunned by the greenery, the housing, the historic characters, the cultural heritage and the welcome. The staff at Saint Mary’s and Aston Hall have been so fabulous to deal with they’ve been like a breath of fresh air (after the sort of characters you get “welcoming” you at places like Blenheim).

Service isn’t always geared to international visitors and I wish shopkeepers in suburban strips like Stirchley and Bournbrook would tidy up their premises. But the coach driver (from Chauffeurs of Birmingham, a new firm to me) was exceptional.

Yes, it it’s not actually all that bad at all. I’m proud to be a Brummie again!

A Word in Defence of London Underground

2010-10-12T10:15:00.000Z

Many people will have seen, or rather heard, the recordings released for the first time at the inquest into the 7 July Terrorist Murders in London.

If you haven’t some examples are at:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-11518501

and

http://www.itv.com/news/77-bombings-inquest07608/

As so often happens with the media, journalists in search of a sound-bit type quote get emotionally charged friends and family to become angry and to use words like “shambolic” which are succinct but frankly inaccurate.

I think the staff of London Underground are getting very unfair treatment here. The "confusion" was very soon after the explosions (of which there were three at disparate locations within 90 seconds) and I think that no organisation could realistically have reacted differently. It may be that people would prefer staff to react in an excited frantic and dramatic way, they way we see on television or in the cinema. In fact, people remaining calm might not make a “good story” but it is the best way of dealing with a situation.

Indeed, some of the stories which have emerged about help, compassion and heroism from some of the station staff deserve a higher profile than this.

There were a lot of heroes that day. And I defy anyone to have reacted better, other than with that wonderful thing, “the benefit of hindsight”.

Arse v Elbow in Stratford-upon-Avon

2010-10-03T16:10:00.003Z

I had a job in Stratford-upon-Avon this afternoon.

Whenever I work there, I endeavour to use the Park & Ride service, preferring to pay £1.50 to be taken in in luxury to searching for a parking spot and then having to take out a mortgage to pay for it.

I knew that the service doesn't operate on Sunday in the winter so before leaving checked the website to see if today had a service or not. Apparently it didn't. Okay, at least I know (even though parking restrictions aren't somehow eased when there's no P&R, which seems a bit like wanting to have your cake and eat it).

So I drove down there and was surprised and delighted to see the matrix on the A3400 just north of the bypass proudly flashing "For Stratford Use Park & Ride", so I headed off to the car park to use it after all. I signalled into the car park.......and was immediately met by locked gates because indeed the service doesn't run on Sundays at this time of year.

Turn the matrices off folks, eh? It makes a bad impression. And if visitors didn't know better, they'd think the town didn't know what it was doing.......

Thoughts on the Labour Leadership

2010-09-27T06:49:00.002Z

I might just be getting old but I don't like these metric politicians, like the Miliband.

I preferred the old Imperials ones. Like Michael Foot.

Another of the Great Questions of (Retail) Life

2010-09-22T13:51:00.002Z

Why is that when I actually want something in a camera or mobile phone shop I can never find anyone to serve me becasue they're too busy.

However, when I just want to have a look around and be left alone, I have to fight off assistants with a stick?

The Mysteries of Railway Time

2010-09-22T11:20:00.003Z

I wonder what the point is of telling passengers that a train is "expected at 1853" when, er, it's already 1854?

(Sorry about the poor image. Camera Phone and all that. I suppose I was lucky not to be challenged for taking photographs on railway property without permission!)

Cycling and Cycling Facilities

2010-09-21T11:29:00.003Z

A recent discussion on the excellent Blog of my friend Daniel in Australia regarding cycle facilities and the compulsory wearing of cycle helmets there prompted me to reply to the ensuing discussion from a UK point of view.

I don't cycle anywhere near as much any more as I used to, although I'm the proud owner of a Brompton. However, I have strong views on the subject of cycling as a means of transport and many factors, from the behaviour of cyclists, pedestrians and road users to the attitudes of planners usually get me a bit hot under the collar.

Anyway, I thought that my contribution merited reproducing on my Blog, too. so here it is:

The view of the general public here varies from outright hostility to cyclists (from motorists and pedestrians who only notice the many cyclists who ignore zebra crossings and red traffic lights) to well-meaning paternalism.

The latter sees both helmets and cycle paths as Good Things. In fact, I've seen as much evidence that helmets make things worse as I have that they make things better. Badly fitted helmets are a particular problem.

Cycle "facilities" are often very poor and frequently (and I mean FREQUENTLY put cyclists in more rather than less danger. Specifically, they confine cyclists to the extreme left hand side of the road, making them less visible and they create far more conflicts with other traffic flows, both regarding motor vehicles and pedestrians.

My view is that cycle lanes and paths do have a function but usually only at extremely busy grade separated junctions or to allow cyclists to avoid complex and lengthy one way system detours.

The problem is that few people seem to regard cyclists as what they are: traffic. Motorists think that "in this day and age"......."they shouldn't be on the road" as "it's too dangerous". Planners think that cycle paths "make cyclists safer" and cyclists themselves weave between being "traffic" and "pedestrians" when it suits them.

I can't offer a solution but I do think there's a lot of merit in treating bicycles as "traffic" just like anything else.

(Incidentally, I would draw a distinction here between cycling as a means of transport and leisure cycling, often involving young children, families and people going especially slowly. In such cases, scenic cycle paths like the Camel Trail which we recently sampled in Cornwall have much to commend them. Even there, though, the conflict between faster cyclists, slower ones and *very* inexperienced ones sometimes led to some hairy moments!)

Railway Rant

2010-09-20T20:17:00.001Z

I’ve been trying for some time to use public transport to and from jobs whenever possible. I’ve always preferred trains and buses but they don’t always coincide with where I need to be when. Throughout 2010, though, I’ve made much more of an effort than before in this direction, even at the expense of taking longer to get to and from places.

Sometimes this is great. Sometimes, it isn’t. Today was one of the latter.

After an “unusual” day in Stratford-upon-Avon, I needed to return by train from Stratford to The Hawthorns. There was a 1727 train from Stratford, sue at The Hawthorns at 1830.

Having finished with my group, I arrived at Stratford station with 40 minutes to wait for the next train. Not the railway’s fault that I arrived there early, although an hourly frequency isn’t that brilliant for a route which isn’t exactly the back of beyond. The train was advertised as running 5 minutes late. The 12 minutes. Then 15. We actually left 13 minutes late at 1745. I’d then been at Stratford station (not an especially attractive site, though I’ve been to worse) for roughly an hour.

On the plus side, rather than stress with driving, I watched the lovely Warwickshire countryside and even had a snooze.

I awoke in Hall Green and decided to check if we’d made up time. In fact, we were later still, now 20 minutes down. At Birmingham Moor Street a rush hour sea of humanity descended on the train. I’m not sure what these trains actually are on the Snow Hill lines but I find their seats amazingly uncomfortable.

A few minute later we roll into Snow Hill station where more people pack in. Then came the clincher of the day. The guard announced that – as the train was running so late – it was going to run non-stop to Stourbridge Junction. Suddenly I (and much of this sea of humanity, some of whom had only just boarded) had to scramble to get off. We were also told nothing more than to “wait on the platform”.

The next train, er, terminated at Snow Hill and eventually the 1743 train, “due at 1753” arrived at, er, 1800. I arrived back at The Hawthorns 40 minutes later than I should have.

More significantly, I arrived there over two hours after I had finished my work in Stratford, a journey which by car, even with rush hour traffic, would have taken not much more than an hour and probably less.

And there’s the railway, nay the “public transport” problem. People like me want to use it but as long as it’s not providing a service where passengers feel “cared for”, where you get uncomfortable rides in delayed and crowded trains…….people will reach for their car keys.

A couple of weeks ago I tried a journey in the opposite direction. I arrived at The Hawthorns in plenty of time, only to find that the Stratford train, an hourly service remember, had been summarily cancelled.

Railways of Britain, do you hear me? YOU CAN’T JUST CANCEL THINGS AND ASUME THAT TELLING PEOPLE IT’S CANCELLED SOMEHOW MAKES IT ALRIGHT. I can’t just ring ahead to people who’ve booked me and say “sorry, I can’t come along today”. And you know what? You can’t either.

Two additional points:

The problem on both these occasions was “signalling problems”. I wonder if that means someone’s stolen a cable again? That caused me problems twice on trains from Manchester and Liverpool earlier in the summer which missed out stops at my local station with literally seconds notice.
To end on a positive not, one thing that London Midland trains really do seem to excel at is station booking office staff. The two chaps at The Hawthorns and the lady at Langley Green are always so happy, so friendly and so pleasant that I walk away from their ticket office windows feeling on top of the world. What a pity the managers who “manage” the line and the drones who reply to customer feedback don’t approach things in the same way.

Mixing Politics and Religion

2010-09-16T18:42:00.005Z

Stephen Fry has made a verbal attack on the right of Pope Benedict XVI to be accorded a State visit to Britain.

Stephen, I usually agree with and admire you very, very much. But I can't agree with your assertion that the Vatican isn't really a real state because of "an accident of words" and that it is a "rump of history". If you think about it, you could say that about *all* states!

Of course, you might not agree with the system or values of said state.......but again, that applies to many, many places.

It is a state and the UK has welcomed far, far dodgier heads of state (and lavished them with pomp, respectability and awards) than Pope Benedict. Look who was so very welcome at the Palace in 1978, for example.

The Value of Nothing.......

2010-09-15T19:09:00.002Z

It's very hard to earn a living out of doing something that other people seem willing to do either free of charge or for amounts so small they might as well be.

Local History societies offer free or dirt-cheap walks, we're all expected to "volunteer" to make the 2012 Olympics a success, people with a language are "recruited" to help with major events like the major conferences or sporting events.

And Ian Jelf is suddenly made to feel like the unacceptable face of Capitalism.

"Oh we don't normally pay."

Go and find someone else, then! Oh, they probably have.......

Savings, Fences and Ostriches

2010-09-14T07:57:00.001Z

It’s interesting to note how many different organisations, undertakings and interest groups are popping up all over the place to say that they ought to be spared in the forthcoming round of spending cuts because they're a "special case".

The problem with this is that everyone’s doing it…….so if everyone’s budget is ring-fenced, we won’t actually make any savings.

I appreciate that there is a point of view that we don’t need to make savings at all. People saying that are probably barking nutters but at least their logic holds water (ie we don’t need to cut so we won’t) and they’re not guilty of selfishness.

It’s this “we must be spared but everyone else can suffer” attitude which I find most reminiscent of an ostrich and a quantity of sand…….

Crop Names

2010-09-13T07:10:00.002Z

One of those minor “linguistic hiccups” between British and American English when I’m working in the countryside is the American name for the crop “Rape”, which they call “Canola”.

Well, thanks to his always excellent and absorbing Blog, my mate in Australia Daniel has now taught me not only that Australians call it “Canola” too but that the word is actually an acronym for “CAnadian Oil Low Acid”.

You live and learn…….and thanks, Daniel!

(Mind you, it’s part of the creeping Americanisation of Australia. They’ll be using Dollars next…….)

Captain Flack & Company.......

2010-09-12T18:00:00.002Z

Many – many – years ago, as a summer job, I did some administrative work for the West Midlands Fire Service. As work experience goes, it was pretty dire but one long lasting legacy was that it left me with a deep and abiding respect for fire fighters. More than any other emergency service they seem to be regularly in danger and we can all sleep safer in our beds for what they do for us.

Notwithstanding this…….

Memo to the Leicester Fire Brigade…….

If you’re going to act up and show off with your big red fire engine on a non-emergency call by interferinge with me trying to do my job:

(1) Don’t choose me. I do repartee for a living

(2) Don’t choose me when I’m with a SPICE group; they tend to join in and play along and

(3) If you’re that bothered about references to Trumpton, you’re probably in the wrong job.

Second City

2010-09-12T05:28:00.001Z

My friend Maeve featured this week on an Australian travel programme called “Getaway”, showing the presenter around Bath.

So far so good.

Unfortunately, while watching the programme, they then went to Manchester…….which they proceeded to call “Britain’s Second City”.

Lose 100 points, Channel 9…….

For the record, this is what the 2001 Census had to say on the matter. (And I don’t want to start hearing things like “Greater Manchester, of I’ll have to start quoting “West Midlands”!):

1 London 7,172,091

2 Birmingham 970,892

3 Glasgow 629,501

4 Liverpool 469,017

5 Leeds 443,247

6 Sheffield 439,866

7 Edinburgh 430,082

8 Bristol 420,556

9 Manchester 394,269

10 Leicester 330,574

At The Pelican

2010-09-09T07:29:00.004Z

I quite often find myself moaning about overnight accommodation. Dim staff, non-functioning facilities and a feeling of being treated as though you're on a conveyor belt reign.

So it's a real pleasure to be able to wax lyrical about a small place I stayed on Tuesday night.

It's supposedly a "pub with rooms" but my room was rather more pleasant and certainly better looked after than many I've stayed in in large hotels. The staff were friendlty and intelligent and young (which is normally only the case in Britain if they're Australian, which these weren't!) and the breakfast delicious.

And where is this place? I salute you The Pelican Inn, which is on the A4 in a village called Froxfield, between Marlborough and Hungerford. Jolly handy for Avebury, Stonehenge, Salisbury and so on.

(But I wish the information pack in the room did'nt tell people that Stonehenge was "Druid Stones". Oh dear! Lose a point!)

Travelling Contrasts

2010-09-08T19:08:00.001Z

Some friends of ours are back from a fabulous honeymoon on the QM2 and a visit to the US.

I’m back from Wiltshire. It was lovely…….bit it’s not quite the same, is it? ;-)

Back on The Road

2010-09-06T21:25:00.002Z

From 1995 until about 2002, I was pretty much full time tour managing. This is markedly different to tour guiding, involving taking people on short or extended holidays and - frankly - dealing with all the hassles that inevitably crop up.

The guiding, that's to say actually telling people things and keeping them entertained, was very much a side issue, although one I both enjoyed and apparently did well at. I like telling people about buildings. I don't like them telling me that they can't flush the toilet or that the waitress only speaks French (not unreasonable in Paris).

But after a period of time, the concept of living out of a suitcase starts to pall and - coupled with having met Louise - I gradually wound down this aspect of work in favour of "proper" guiding.

But it was a learning experience, I met some fabulous people (far outnumbering the bad ones) and it was a good period in my life.

The reason for writing this down here now is that I'm about to do a couple of days touring with a group down in the South of England. The suitcase is packed, the hotel fixed up, I have wads of paperwork and the itinerary is planned.

It will be quite like old times and I confess.......I'm actually rather looking forward to it!

Far From Best Western

2010-08-28T21:20:00.002Z

I'm usually quite a fan of Best Western Hotels, a chain of independently owned "real" hotels run by "real" people in contrast to the usual anonymous corporate groups.

Sadly, one of their staff at an hotel in East Anglia lost them a booking today by being offhand in the extreme and trying to tell me I'd misread something. Of course, that might have been true (I don't think it was but we all make mistakes). However, her triumphalist mocking of me for doing so reminded me of the way a teacher might talk to a pupil at primary school.

Plonk! One lost booking, quickly replaced by something which has turned out to be better.

One of Life's Little Questions

2010-08-28T20:09:00.003Z

Why is it that only ladies with really terrible hair-dos wear those funny clear plastic rain hoods?

BBC Radio 4 Strikes Again

2010-08-28T16:19:00.001Z

As if I needed proof that BBC Radio 4 justifies trhe licence fee on its own…….

I drove back from Oxfrod this afternoon with the ever varied Radio 4 keeping me company. In the space of an hour it gave me a remarkably well-dramatized account of the escape of Charles II after the Battle of Worcester in 1651, an item on the political beliefs of Jimi Hendrix and a heart-rending account of a woman who gave up her baby for adoption in 1963 to have him track her down decades later.

The miles just fly by with this t9o keep the old grey matter going. It was almost one of those periods when you don’t want the journey to end. Try challenging that sort of stuff BSkyB!

Time Shift Television

2010-08-26T21:44:00.002Z

One of the more useful (if not exactly the greatest) inventions of the last 30 years has probably been the video recorder and its modern day successors the DVD recorder and PVR and HDR.

The ability to watch something later than it goes out, at a time convenient for you and not the programme-planners is one of life’s minor satisfactions.

But I sometimes find myself wishing for an additional convenience. I wish you could “time shift” recordings the other way and watch them before they’re aired. That way I could have seen tonight’s “Grumpy Old Men” when I wanted to. And before I fell asleep.

Clerkenwet!

2010-08-26T08:43:00.002Z

Last night I did an evening walk in the lovely, atmospheric Clerkenwell area on London. It’s a genuinely fascinating area, home to such varied delights as the New River (not new, not a River), the Finsbury Health Centre, Saint John’s Gate and some K4s and K6s thrown in for good measure.

But oh, what an evening for weather! It just just bucketed it down for the whole two hours and the legendary Ian Jelf Umbrella was actually of practical use for once. Now, despite our country’s reputation for bad weather, this is actually a surprisingly rare occurrence I find on walks. Traditionally, I recall two such occasions, one in Rugby and the other in the Moseley area of Birmingham. But this one definitely goes up into that category, I’m sad to say.

Luckily, I had an extremely tenacious group whose desire to learn more about the place left me staggered!

Thank you, dear member of SPICE Adventure London!

Democracy and the Sausage Sizzle

2010-08-21T06:39:00.002Z

It’s Election Day in Australia today (Saturday).

Australia has spent 109 years throwing off the British Imperialism and has now developed sufficiently to give its voters a choice of a Welsh-born woman or a London-born man as Prime Minister.

More intriguingly, I’ve just discovered that queues to vote are apparently equipped with – and I’m not making this up – a “Sausage Sizzle”! Now if we could do that I’m sure it would to much to reduce British voter apathy. People would also probably not notice when the polling stations closed before they'd had a chance to vote.......

The Bear Facts of Life, Marriage and Everything

2010-08-19T08:17:00.005Z

Some friends of ours are getting married tomorrow and it’s set me thinking about the institution. I came relatively late to marriage but - although this sounds corny - I can thoroughly recommend it!

On the train last night I read an article by a woman journalist that said she’d been told by men friends that they avoid women who collect teddies or cuddly toys as it makes them “unhinged” and therefore suspect. Hmmmm.

It so happens that I’m married to a decidedly level-headed, well-“hinged”, intelligent and fun loving lady who has a vast collection of bears gathered over the years. Some are valuable for reasons of scarcity, many more are “valuable” as they remind her (and nowadays often me, too) of happy times and visits. The camel I won at Blackpool Pleasure Beach; Heinrich from the Rhine (named after Heinrich Heine, whose Lorelei was nearby); the giant Charmin Bear won in a raffle at Sainsbury’s; and the koala from…….well, guess!

It seems to me that “normal people” (ha!) do love this idea of everyone conforming. We all should lead the same “normal” lives. We’re supposed to clean the car on Sundays, spend Thursday evening in Sainsbury’s, worry about new curtains clashing with the futon or engaging in one-upmanship about everything from flat-screen TVs to baby buggies.

I’m glad that I can share my life with someone decidedly not like that (but actually rather like me, with my eclectic collecting habits). Someone who – although perfectly able to have fun, a lot of it, too – doesn’t regard throwing up in the gutter as the objective to a night out and with whom I can have engaging, intelligent conversations and an engaging, intelligent fun life.

She’s pretty good at sorting out computer problems, too. ;-)

I know that Nicki and Dave - tomorrow's happy couple - are on course for similar happiness. Wishing you both lots and lots of it, too!

"Day Off". Ha!

2010-08-08T17:12:00.004Z

I've virtually always had jobs which involve weekend working and - although I love what I do - it does sometimes pall to be working when those close to you aren't and vice versa.

However, today was a day off which proved to be arduous beyond words. Hedges trimmed, the ever-present lawns given TLC, more clearing out and various other preparations.

I wish I'd been working "properly". At least someone would have been paying me at the end!

Shed Loads of Hassle

2010-08-07T18:06:00.001Z

For reasons I won’t bore you with, having come back from a job this afternoon, we decided to clean out the garden shed.

This was a job of truly herculean proportions and within 20 minutes the back garden looked as though a small nuclear explosion had taken place.

Where does all this stuff come from? Actually, we’re afraid to admit that some of it came from the previous occupants of the house. We have no idea what some of the things in jars were but we’re pretty certain that some of them would probably have been of interest to the weapons inspectors in Iraq.

To our surprise, though, we did manage to make it all reasonably tidy. Eventually. Just one question remained, though. It’s one we’ve had posed before and wonder if anyone else has, too?

Why is it that you clean somewhere out, throw loads of stuff away and still struggle to get all the stuff you’re keeping back in?

Farewell, Old Friends!

2010-07-27T07:45:00.005Z

After a job working in Moseley on Saturday morning, I was lucky enough to be able to get over to Acocks Green in time to watch the last ever operation by MCW Metrobuses.

For those "not in the know", the Metrobus was a late seventies design of double decker, born out of a collaboration between Metro Cammell Weymann (MCW) in the UK and Scania in Sweden. The resultant bus (called a Metro Scania) seemed especially popular on the streets on Newport and Reading for some reason! But they allegedly rusted quicker than they could be built!

So, an all UK version, the "Metrobus" was born. Manufactures in vast quantities at MCW's Birmingham factory at Washwood Heath, they found buyers all over the country. But local loyalties ensured that they would become the mainstay of West Midlands bus operation.

They proved surprisingly enduring and "last Metrobus Days" were held successively in Walsall, Birmingham and finally on three routes running from Acocks Green on Saturday.

Although not in the league of seeing off the last regular Routemasters in London, the event did attract quite a bit of attention from the enthusiast community. Actually, they themselves attracted a fair bit of attention from passing motorists!

Just a Thought

2010-07-25T17:11:00.006Z

I am not usually a fan of Scottish Nationalism. A party dedicated to breaking up the country I love into constituent and bickering bits seems to lean too much towards Balkanisation.

However, I have to admire the attitude of the Scottish Government’s Justice Minister Kenny MacAskill in refusing to appear before a US Senate Committee to answer questions about the release of Abdelbaset Ali al-Megrahi, the convicted Lockerbie bomber.

The Lockerbie bombing – although it involved a US aircraft – occurred over the UK; specifically over Scottish soil. Therefore, any questions regarding Abdelbaset Ali al-Megrahi are matters for Scottish jurisdictions, possibly with some UK involvement as international relations are a reserved matter, ie one of concern to Westminster. It does not involve the USA.

America is a wonderful country, a land of freedom and decency and one which has stood by us (as we have stood by it) through the centuries. I am glad and proud that we are friends, in equal measure. But it does not rule the world, the writ of its law does not extend beyond its borders and other jurisdictions are not at its beck and call like ancient colonies or forelock-tugging servants, to be summoned to account for their actions at their command.

For what it’s worth, I don’t think Abdelbaset Ali al-Megrahi should have been released. He showed no compassion to his victims and to be spred the death penalty for taking life is – in my view – sufficient reason to imprison people for the rest of their lives.

Furthermore, there seems to be an opinion that he might be innocent. I cannot claim to know or understand enough about the case to have a view on that.

But it is worth saying that he was tried and convicted by a Scottish court and that really is the end of the matter. It is a Scottish decision and it certainly doesn’t involve the US.

I wonder if George W. Bush would consent to come and be questioned by the Chilcot Inquiry to account for his actions?

Just a thought.

I Need a Rest!

2010-07-25T16:36:00.004Z

I worked in Tamworth, a lovely and interesting old Staffordshire town which deserves better than the "chav-filled hell-hole" reputation it has among some people. Mostly ones from Lichfield and Sutton actually but I digress.......

The days work done, we came home for a "spot" (ha!) of gardening. It's nearly two weeks since the lawns were done and we're unlikely to have much chance to do a "heavy" garden session in the coming days. So, off to work we set. and what fun it was:

The grass was so long that the lawn mower struggled to cope. It took forever and it will still need another "trim" in the next few days.
The hedge trimmer - whose cable was cut by Someone [TM] on its first use and subsequently repaired - has somehow managed to get its cable cut again. This was presumably during storage but means that we still don't have a trimmed hedge.
During the lawn mowing I was stung or bitten by something on the leg. I was however Mummy's Brave Little Soldier and Louise attended me with full first aid kit. Well, a tube of Savlon.
While raking the compost bin I disturbed a nest of bees which decided to mount a fairly serious assault.
The strimmer keeps losing its thread (I know how it feels)
And finally (as they say on the News) some "neighbours are having what sounds bvery much like a Blues Party in the next street. Goodness knows what it must be like actually living over there because it's a bit deafening for us.

I wish I was back at work!

Cycling and Bike Share Schemes

2010-07-21T18:14:00.003Z

I used to be quite a keen cyclist. Not the lycra or £2,500 bike, etc. but I did cycle quite often and am the proud owner of a Brompton folding bike, a splendid piece of British-built kit which you now see more and more on the streets.

One of the beauties of Bromptons is that they make multi-modal journeys easier; you just fold them up and pop them on the train, in the boot of the car or even, apparently, on the bus (not that I’ve ever tried the latter).

I’ve always meant to take the Brompton to London for the day but somehow never managed to get around to it. Something else is about to happen, though, which might bet me on two wheels in the capital from time to time: Transport for London’s new Barclay’s Cycle Hire. This scheme, similar to Velib in Paris or Melbourne Bike Share in, er, Melbourne, sees a large number of bicycles for hire at special docking stations around the capital. Basically, you go along to one, pay a hire fee by credit card and cycle away! (It’s actually rather more complex than that with an “access fee” and so on but you get the idea.) You can return the bike to any docking stand and the charging system is designed to encourage shorter term use.

One thing the scheme won’t have though is cycle helmets for hire. Unlike in some countries, the use of cycle helmets in the UK is not compulsory. But the absence of them (and who’s likely to just ”have one on them”?) may well put some people off. It will certainly cause at least some negative comment in the press, I think.

Not everyone thinks that helmets are a good idea, though. It’s sometimes said that safety features in cars, like air-bags for example, make people more reckless and that the same applies to cycle helmets. I’ve also heard it suggested that they can compound injuries in certain cases, especially if poorly fitted.

That said, when I cycle (which as I say is all too infrequently nowadays) I always wear one. I feel safer - a bit safer - with it and always take as much care as possible. On a more mundane note, it's saved me from being hurt by overhanging branches on off-road routes a couple of times!

But “safety” on two wheels is often at odds with “perceived safety” by the Great British Public. For example, a bigger gripe of mine is cycle paths and lanes. Beloved of planners who like to Do Things To Encourage Cycling, these often put a cyclist at much more of a disadvantage and in more danger. They introduce far more conflicts and junctions, are generally poorly maintained and swept and give motorists the latent belief that bicycles somehow don't really "belong" on the road.

That said, many (MANY) cyclists make life hard for themselves and the rest of us by blatantly flouting the rules of the road, using footpaths when it suits them and ignoring red lights. This means that as soon as you stick up for cycling as a means of transport, people throw the behaviour of cyclists back in your face.

Anyway, despite that homily, I’ll be watching Barclays Cycle Hire with great interest, though. If I ever get around to trying it out, I’m sure I’ll have plenty to report.

Shops (Interesting Shops, that is!)

2010-07-20T11:25:00.003Z

It might surprise those here who know me to find me penning a Blog entry on the subject of shopping. It’s never been my favourite pastime (bookshops expected, of course) but these days with every town having basically the same shops, it’s more dull than ever.

Occasionally, though, there are shops which somehow manage to buck the trend and remain perpetually the same, despite the onset of globalisation.

The most timeless of these A Oakes in Langley. In business since 1905 it was a regular haunt in my childhood, from visits to see Father Christmas (none of the “Santa Cklaus” business!) in the days when Father Christmas really was an old man and hadn’t been (or needed to be!) CRB checked. As I grew up it became the shop for my school uniforms and perhaps that’s why when I escaped from the hell that was my schooldays, I never went near the place again. Then, about a year or so ago, I was out driving with Mum and we thought we’d go in and have a look to see how much it had changed. Basically, it hadn’t! The place was almost exactly as I remembered it, with wooden draws full of socks and underwear stacked around the walls and – unusually, on reflection – a huge stock of model railway equipment for sale. A quick Google search has revealed that Oakes now even have an internet presence and seem set to continue for ever.

So timeless was it, I expected a Midland Red D9 to go past the door on a 215…….

Another of these time-warp stores is Walker & Ling in Weston-super-Mare. This has also been in business since the year dot and - although they’ve obviously had the decorators in more than Oakes, they still seem to thrive selling stuff that you’d expect most people now to buy from Debenham’s or M&S. The fact that they don’t and that they thrive as a locally-owned small business in a sea of retail mediocrity is a delight. I was very happy to buy myself a jacket there last week to help keep them going!

For sheer size, though the greatest of these shops I know of is Jackson’s, the old retailing lady of Reading. Unlike the others, Jackson’s really is a department store. Like Oakes, though, it will forever be associated for people of a certain age with stocking school uniforms. Whenever I’m working in Reading and have any locals on tours (which does happen), you can see everyone recalling an era of blazers, striped ties, sew-on name labels and football shirts. And, for all their history and conservatism, not only do Jacksons have a website, they have a Blog!

If you get a chance, go and support these businesses and other like them. Long may they continue to thrive!

Tidying Up

2010-07-19T19:43:00.001Z

Louise suggested tonight that we spend Friday tidying the house.

Tidying our house doesn't require "Friday"; it required "August"!

We Do Remember Them

2010-07-19T16:46:00.002Z

I once encountered someone at an event I was running who asked incredulously “Er, was Australia actually involved in the war?!”

It is perhaps as well that I don’t recount here my reply. :-(

However, as one Briton that is profoundly grateful for the role played by Australia in protecting my country’s freedom, I humbly direct readers to the following news items from today.

We really, really do “remember them”.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-10679715

http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2010/07/19/2958313.htm?site=news

The perpetual remembrance of these men is the splendid and remarkably little known Commonwealth War Graves Commission. Anyone that’s ever done a tour of Maidenhead with me will recall their headquarters there, They are not a UK government agency but are funded jointly by the governments of the Nations involved in the First World War. They too are worthy of investigation and recognition.

http://www.cwgc.org/

Back to School?!

2010-07-19T15:58:00.001Z

I’ve had an e-mail from Aldi, advertising their “Back to School” PC.

Back to School?! The poor little buggers have hardly broken up yet and already we’re being subjected to preparations for the new school year!

How long before someone mentions C*******s?

NHS: Improvements Gratefully Noted

2010-07-02T15:40:00.003Z

I have just posted an e-mail to the Birmingham & Midland Eye Centre to say how fantastically they dealt with my mother's appointment today.

Her previous visits have bordered on the farcical with cancelled appointments, exceptionally rude and disinterested staff and the constant necessity for me to engage in administrative warfare in order to get Mum treated properly.

Well what a change! In the place of the most sour-faced miserable trout imaginable who used to man reception, we had a bright, smiling team who made us feel as though we were being welcomed into an hotel. Staff led Mum to the waiting area and came back at intervals to say how long she would have to wait (which wasn't long).

It is - as I've pointed out in the past - at least as easy to do things well as it is to do them badly.

I'm not sure if I played any part in this transformation but however it came about, they deserve credit for it.

Other NHS Departments please take note.......

Oh Canada!

2010-07-01T17:49:00.002Z

Today is Canada Day, worthy of a mention as it’s a place very dear to me.

That might seem a strange thing to say about a country I’ve only ever visited once, but it was where I proposed to my wife, on the shores of the incomparable Lake Louise so will always have a special place in my – our – hearts.

Like Australia, Canada combines all the things that are good about Britain and America, while, at least as far as I can see, managing to leave out the bad bits of both.

It is beautiful, democratic, open and fair; it also happens to be a monarchy and boast a large slice of French culture. Goodness, this place is heaven!

Happy Canada Day / Joyeux fête du Canada!

Standards and Expectation in JelfWorld

2010-06-30T21:51:00.000Z

Sometimes, when I fall out with service provides (railways, bus companies, the NHS to name but three with whom I’ve locked horns), I ask them to achieve what they say is “impossible” by working harder, earlier or later.

This usually elicits peals of laughter from friends when I tell them what I’ve said. But it comes from the way I work…….and the fact that I;ve just finished doing Something That Had To Be Done at 10.45pm.

And I’m absolutely certain that anyone I’ve expected this of was earning less than me, too…….

Railcards: I Want One!

2010-06-30T00:21:00.002Z

The plethora of different tickets available is a well known feature of Britain’s privatised railway system.

Whether this is a Good Thing or a Bad thing largely depends on whether or not you’ve just managed to get hold of a Birmingham – London ticket for £5 or whether your sudden need to get to Newcastle-upon-Tyne for a family emergency has been met by a bill for £190.00.

But one feature of the railway system that can always help knock a few pounds off is the Railcard. Now once upon a time these came in versions for Senior Citizens (I think they may even have been called “Old People” in those non-PC days) and for Students.

Over the years, they’ve appeared for more and more groups. All “Young People” (ie those under 25; PC doesn’t seem to apply in this direction!); the Disabled; members of HM Forces; “Families”; and so on.

However, I can’t help wishing that there was a Railcard for people like me, who use the railways quite often and would do so more if this loyalty was rewarded with access to discounted fares. Now plainly, this would have to be set at a realistic price. I can hardly expect to be offered the same discounts as the other groups mentioned. But it would be an encouragement to travel by train more often. A bit like the way in which actually owning a car encourages you to use it since you’ve already paid a set of fixed costs.

Some countries, such as Switzerland (unsurprisingly) and Germany, already have such a card. Indeed, so does Britain, if you happen to live in the South East and can thus buy a Network Railcard.

So why can’t the rest of us get something similar?

2CV World Exclusive: "Don't Blame Me!"

2010-06-29T14:42:00.004Z

There were some small oil-spots on the drive at the weekend, for which "Ronnie", my recently-serviced and MOT'd 2CV was blamed.

Now, I discover, they were coming from the 3 year old Astra.

The 2CV is seeking advice from its lawyers.

English Heritage

2010-06-28T07:27:00.002Z

I’ve visited two major properties this weekend in the care of English Heritage. This, for the initiated, is a government agency responsible for the preservation of certain historic properties and monuments in England, as well as having certain planning responsibilities and being responsible for the famous Blue Plaques.

They perhaps wouldn’t thank me for this description but it’s a sort of nationalised equivalent of the National Trust.

They are sometimes seen as a poor relation of the NT, too. Perhaps this is because they own a lot more properties that are nowadays minus their roofs? Perhaps it’s just a matter of social cache. Whatever, they have nothing like the Trust’s profile.

Well, I want to redress the balance. Their properties are staffed by people who are enthusiastic, who are keen and above all who are knowledgeable. (I wonder if they would consider working in the National Health Service?)

On Saturday at Stokesay Castle we were greeted with a smile to melt your heart by people who were so obviously pleased that we were there!

Then yesterday to Goodrich Castle, the one young chap, who just oozed enthusiasm, was keen to tell us why Goodrich was important and to give us some (again very keen and thought out) ideas on where else we ought to visit. (Note to self: work out a date to visit Nunney Castle).

I’m a member of both English Heritage and the National Trust. I do this because I want to contribute to the amazing and expensive work they do to preserve the built fabric of this country. I could get free admission even on my Blue Badge, so joining is a genuine act of support, not just a way of cutting the cost of visits!

I’m also very proud of the National Trust, a unique organisation the envy of the world. This is no reflection on them, nor a list of shortcomings. It's simply that English Heritage deserves better recognition and gratitude for what it and its staff do so well. It’s a pity they only pop up in the press when the new visitor centre at Stonehenge is in the headlines…….

Go and find and English Heritage property to visit soon. Tell them Ian sent you! J

Links:

English Heritage

The National Trust

Stokesay Castle, Shropshire

Goodrich Castle, Herefordshire

Just for a Change.......

2010-06-24T12:09:00.002Z

In my professional life, I suppose I will always be associated with guiding on matters associated with the Industrial Revolution. I suppose that's a natural result of being based in the Birmingham area; well, that and the fact that I tend to get offered guiding jobs that no-one else wants!

Yes, I can do all the standard Shakespeare stuff in Stratford, Royalty and history in London and the more offbeat places. But my colleagues in particular always tend to think of me in the same breath as the likes of James Watt or Matthew Boulton.

But my areas of preference tend to be the likes of the Romans, the Bronze Age and the English Civil War.

So it's made a very pleasant change to be asked to "do something" associated with a period sadly overlooked in this country: the arrival of the Normans under William the Conqueror and the effect that they had on Saxon England.

As they say, "watch this space"!

The Australienne

2010-06-24T07:24:00.003Z

So Australia has its first female Prime Minister (Julia Gillard), who was installed following something of a coup within the ruling Labour (sorry “Labor”) Party. The emotion in the voice of the defeated PM Kevin Rudd was palpable. It’s a harsh place, Australian politics, even by British standards…….

On reflection, having a female occupy the position of head of government isn’t perhaps the biggest sea change in history. After all, plenty of other major counties have already achieved this (the UK, Canada, India, New Zealand).

Indeed, it seems to have escaped the Australian media’s attention that the country has had a female Head of State since 1952! Furthermore, the current Governor General (the Queen’s day-to-day representative) is also a woman, as are two of the State Premiers (jn Queensland and New South Wales). Evidently the country isn’t nearly so bloke-ey as it is sometimes held to be…….

Although she’s lived in Australia since she was five years old, Julia Gillard was actually born in Britain, in Barry in South Wales. As far as I can tell, the last UK-born PM was Billy Hughes, way back around the time of the First World War!

In this context, it is interesting to note that the US doesn’t allow anyone not born in the USA to become President. This is a strange rule in a nation, like Australia, built on the concept of immigration. It means that Miss Gillard could never have assumed this role in the USA; an interesting comparison to make. (Even the UK has had at least one PM born overseas, Bonar Law, born in Canada.)

Anyway, interesting times ahead. Australian Prime Ministers tend to be a bit anonymous in Britain, where most people can recall Whitlam and Menzies; oh and Paul Keating but only because he man-handled the Queen!

See also Daniel Bowen's piece on this on his Diary of An Average Australian (which is always worth reading anyway!). http://www.danielbowen.com/2010/06/24/julia-gillard-pm/

Back Blogging!

2010-06-21T17:12:00.001Z

About time the Blog had some life pumped into it again.

Sorry for the absence for so long…….all sorts of work and family issues! Anyway, time to move on…….

I often seem to Blog (and post to Facebook and now to Twitter) that I’m doing such-and-such but somehow I wish I was somewhere else. I wish I was in Somerset. Or London. Or Paris. Or the Isle of Man. Or Australia. (Actually, it’s quite often Australia.)

Well, do you know what? Today I’ve sat and worked at the PC out in the garden in beautiful sunshine and managed to get loads done. Then I called around to see my Mum and wasted some time watching an old film with her.

And now I’ve come home and gone out into the garden with Louise and sat and chatted and played tennis and Frisbee and you know what?

Right now I’m happy to be right here. :-)

Railway Complaint

2010-06-01T21:44:00.004Z

I've been missing from the Blogosphere for some time due to all sorts of work and personal commitments.

I'm back though to post the text of customer feedback I've sent today to London Midland, concerning a train journey today. Their service (and especially their station staff) are actually pretty good, certainly when compared to their predecessors, Central Trains. Indeed, even what happened today wasn't the biggest catastrophe in transport history.

What managed to get my goat was that they did exactly the same thing last time I had a day out with them and it's starting to make me think it's a regular occurrence about which they don't care. Last time the reply took weeks. I'll keep you posted this time.

Dear Sir,

I took a trip from Sandwell & Dudley today, taking advantage of the Great Escape Offer. I think this is a super idea and had a lovely day out to Liverpool last time you offered it…….marred only by my train unexpectedly missing out Sandwell & Dudley Station on the return leg, with poor ( = virtually non existent) passenger information “given” when that happened.

I wrote to tell you about this then and – after a l-o-n-g delay received a very anodyne reply blaming Network Rail.

Well, I thought naively to myself, these things happen and a train trip can be a very pleasant way of making a journey. So today, Shrewsbury it was.

And guess what happened on the return trip (1547 from Shrewsbury)? Just as we approached Wolverhampton, the guard announced that the train would be proceeding straight to Birmingham and not stopping at Sandwell & Dudley. No advice of what to do, not apology, no concern, just a statement of fact.

This time, I quickly gathered my things together and left the train, managing to find a local train to complete my journey. (Wolverhampton station is curiously devoid of staff but I suppose you’ll tell me that “that’s down to Virgin”.)

Net result? A 40 minute delay to a journey that should only have taken an hour.

I know things go wrong (I heard on the connecting train that there had been vandalism to the signalling system “again”; can’t the railway guard its property in “known trouble spots"?)

As I said last time, whole sections of society, such as the majority of my social circle, simply never use trains because they don’t provide the sort of caring service people are used to today in the world of Waitrose, John Lewis, Lakeland or the hotel trade. I was on a train in Switzerland which caught fire once. Staff moved us onto another train within 10 minutes, our journey was replanned and we arrived on time at our destination. If the railway(s) want more types of people to use their services then they need to behave in a way that shows *care* for customers, not just tell them that what they want ( = need) isn’t happening.

And *don’t* tell me this is Network Rail’s problem. You’re the train operator, you have my money and if you want any more of it you’ll need to show me you actually give a toss.

Looking forward to a sensible, detailed and considered reply. From someone with a clue, please.

Yours faithfully

Ian Jelf

Election Day Thought

2010-05-06T08:03:00.001Z

Verse III of "The Pied Piper of Hamelin" by Robert Browning seems remarkably relevant.......

At last the people in a body
To the town hall came flocking:
"'Tis clear," cried they, "our mayor's a noddy;
And as for our corporation—shocking
To think we buy gowns lined with ermine
For dolts that can't or won't determine
What's best to rid us of our vermin!
Rouse up, sirs! Give your brains a racking
To find the remedy we're lacking,
Or, sure as fate, we'll send you packing!"
At this the mayor and corporation
Quaked with a mighty consternation.

Shivers Down the Spine

2010-03-10T08:13:00.000Z

I’ve noticed an unusual trend doing walking tours over the last few weeks.

People seem incredibly susceptible to the cold. Okay, we’re just coming out of winter. Okay, it’s certainly not been balmy. But people seem to literally shiver in temperatures between 4C and 7C; hardly arctic. I make sure I have layers on but in these sort of temperatures don’t even need a scarf or gloves.

I did think that some people just don’t dress for the conditions (and they certainly don’t; fashion seems more important than practicality for many) but one client did suggest that the majority of people now are simply cosseted all day in warm offices and travel by car and simply aren’t used to being outside for long periods.

It’s a worrying trend for me. I have visions of only being able to do walks between June and September.

I’ll have to start wintering in the Southern Hemisphere…….

Michael Foot 1913 -2010

2010-03-03T19:18:00.001Z

Sad to hear of the demise of Michael Foot, although a full life lived to the age of 96 is no mean achievement. He was a champion of Parliament and was motivated by a desire to make things better for people. I hope I leave one tenth the legacy of having "done something" that he did.

However, being committed, passionate, principled and honest is tempered somewhat by being, er, wrong, about so many things. Britain would not have been better served by unilaterally disarming. The British people had no appetite for centralised state control on the scale he espoused. And they are also for the most part not republican in their sympathies.

So he was always on something of a hiding to nothing and the electoral defeat of 1983 certainly involved the use of the word "hiding".

Above all, though, it is difficult to know who provided the biggest boost to Mrs Thatcher's fortunes in the early 1980s: General Galtieri or Michael Foot.

Still Here!

2010-03-03T08:37:00.003Z

I seem to have been missing from the Blog for ages. Sorry.

The simple reason for this is that I’m bereft of much free time at the moment.

Spring it evidently springing and there’s been a sudden clutch of bookings for new tours and similar work lately. Good. I’ve also been spending quite a bit of time hosting study days (one of the Jelf sidelines!) which means I keep visiting Manchester! (I’m not complaining about that. As I’ve said before it’s actually a rather splendid city and I was able to see some of its new trams the other day.)

I’m also in the final stages now of studying for some exams I’m taking in March and April, so it feels a bit as though it’s the early 1980s again. (Exams, Argentina sabre-rattling in the South Atlantic, terrorist attacks in Northern Ireland and a recession.)

So, before this afternoon’s job (in Birmingham) I suppose I’d better get back to my notes on Cornish Tin Mining mineralogy (as you do)…….

Ian Jelf: Domestic God

2010-02-16T18:21:00.001Z

It is a fact of life that I do not enjoy doing things I’m not very good at. Put me in front of an old building, a Roman ruin, a bus or the Sydney Opera House and I will happily keep an audience entertained for hours.

Put me in charge of putting a duvet back in its cover and I will still keep an audience entertained…….but for all the wrong reasons. And I will be Very Unhappy about it.

Louise is poorly at the moment (having caught the bug I had last week) so I’m being more than usually domestic. I have today been out with a shopping list, little of which actually tallied with what seems to exist on the shelves.

“No, not that one, the double chocolate ones we usually have”. Sigh.

I have tried to make the washing machine and tumble drier work.

“But why do we put it on ‘G’? What’s that setting mean?”

“Oh I don’t know, it just is!”

And now I've put two duvets back inside their covers in a series of moves which to the untrained eye would make it appear that I was playing a strip version of “Twister”.

Get well soon, Louise. I need you!

(But I know I’m better with canal architecture and Iron Age earthworks. I'll let you know about the pancakes.......)

The Meaning of True Love. Apparently.

2010-02-14T17:07:00.005Z

Well, it is the feast of Saint Valentine, a time to think of true love, companionship and the meeting of hearts. A time perhaps to do a lighthearted "love-themed" walk in Birmingham (one of which I did this morning) and a time to discard the often vulgar trappings of modern life in favour of the simplicity of genuine romance.

Well, I thought so, until I saw these adorning the window of a bar in Broad Street, Birmingham.

Is true romance dead? Am I getting old? Am I a prude? Apprently, yes.

Bill Bailey, SuperMusician

2010-02-04T08:56:00.004Z

In an era of mass produced identikit synthetic "celebrities" lacking no talent other than, er, "being famous", it's wonderful to see someone with talent in spades: Bill Bailey.

Last night we watched "Bill Bailey's Remarkable Guide to the Orchestra" which originally went out last year on BBC 2. The guy is nothing short of a genius. Every time he opens his mouth you realise that he understands what he's talking about and his ability to dissect pieces of music and notice things you'd never otherwise see is a joy.

Highlights?

Proving to us that the theme to Panorama sounds more-or-less the same played forwards or backwards.

Rearranging a Nokia ringtone for French Horn.

Making us wonder how ITN's Non Stop could ever function as a serious news theme. (But it was, for decades!)

Helping to play Saint-Saens' The Swan on cowbells.

And making NBC's Nightly News theme The Mission out as something of a modern day classic.

But without any doubt, the piece de resistance was turning to theme to Doctor Who into a Belgian-style jazz piece. The sooner that's released commercially the better.

I see that Amazon have the DVD. Go and buy it at once!

Cadbury's: Everyone's (apparently) a Fruit & Nut Case

2010-02-03T18:22:00.002Z

A lot has been written in the last few days about Kraft’s takeover of Cadbury’s. Indeed, if I hear an American accent calling it “Cad – berry” once more I’ll not be responsible for my actions…….

It is truly the end of an era and all that. But people can wring their hands as much as they like. Cadbury’s shareholders were free to dispose of their shares as they liked…….so 71% of them did. Given the immediate offer of cash, I for one am impressed that as many as 29% of the shares were in the hands of people who still voted against it.

Of course you could argue that the UK should have rules that restrict this sort of hostile take-over. Remember, Cadbury’s wasn’t LDV or Rover. It wasn’t a “basket case”. It’s successful, not in need of investment or help and didn’t want to be taken over. But once you’re a plc in the UK you are very much prey to this sort of thing. When you stop and think about it, it’s like the lunatics running the asylum.

I’m petty sure that in the short term little will change. Indeed, if you work for Cadbury’s at Keynsham, you might think this is a Good Thing as Cadbury’s were planning to close that plant and Kraft have said they’ll keep it open. In the medium to long term, though, things might not look so good, in Keynsham or in Birmingham.

The problem with all this can be summed up in three words: Terry’s of York. Kraft have “form” when it comes to buying UK confectionery firms and then shipping production somewhere cheaper.

Cadbury’s brand is strong. The chocolate is the best in the world (as I was explaining to some Swiss visitors only last year…….) and evidently it’s a product “worth having”. Indeed, Kraft seem to have taken a big financial risk themselves to get their hands on Cadbury’s.

I don’t think they’ll do it soon. But I have a distinct feeling that in the medium to long term, things will be irresistibly different. My fear is that in ten years’ time Crème Eggs will come from Bratislava and the Bournville Village Trust will be worried that a giant IKEA is rising up overlooking the village green on the “Dairy Milk Enterprise Park”. If I’m wrong about this, no-one will be more pleased than me.

I think I’ll go and get some Dairy Milk now, while I can still do so without the guilt.

Incidentally, it’s worthwhile mentioning that none of this affects in any way the Garden Village of Bournville which, surprising to many, does not and never has belonged to Cadbury’s. George Cadbury set it up (with commendable foresight) as an independent charitable trust. Indeed, many of the things that are being bandied around as “special” at the moment pertain to the community of Bournville, rather than the factory.

To Cardiff and Back

2010-01-31T18:41:00.004Z

I did a job in Cardiff today.

Wales' capital is a stately place, every inch a capital city and - despite all the bilingual signs - an entirely "British" city.

Its Civic Centre, a collection of grand public buildings makes it feel an even more important place than it is and is probably my favourite thing to show off. But as ever on an Ian walk there are lots of hidden places to show people. Today, I've had them gawping at the ground floor of a multi-storey car park, a set of wheelie bins, a subway with a tramp in it and the hotel where Gene Pitney died.

They weren't quite as much into the Doctor Who locations as some groups I've had and I was actually quite disturbed by how few people seemed to know what Aneurin Bevan was famous for; but then I suppose that's my job, isn't it?

They were such a pleasant group that we ended up having lunch together. bizarrely this was in a pub called the Owain Glyndwr.......named after a 15th century Welsh leader who, er, burned Cardiff to the ground. Interesting what you have to do these days to get a pub named after you, isn't it?!

Then I drove home listening to The Wurzels. Pretty good day! :-)

Australia Day

2010-01-26T08:29:00.002Z

Today is Australia Day, which prompts me to Blog up a few words about one of my favourite countries.

I don’t think anywhere suffers more from an unfounded image problem in Britain than Australia. It conjures up for so many people images of people wearing hats with corks dangling from them, drinking Castlemaine XXXX, Rolf Harris playing the Didgeridoo, low budget television soaps and culture being spelled “Kulcha”. Attributes like this are rarely accurate and in Australia’s case are just downright nonsense.

“Kulcha”? How many other countries are principally known around the world for having an Opera House, for goodness’ sake?

In any case, Australia’s culture actually goes back between 40,000 and 60,000 years (no-one is quite sure). Far from being savages in need of civilizing, Australia’s indigenous people seem to have been the world’s first mariners (by a considerable margin) and have kept and preserved their history in a way unrivalled elsewhere.

As is usually the case, the British, least of all Captain Cook, didn’t “discover” Australia at all. Man had known it to be there for centuries and the Chinese, the Portuguese and the Dutch all made cursory expeditions to the North, as did an English privateer called William Dampier, who left behind his name.

It was the British though that first properly surveyed the beautiful and (importantly) fertile East Coast (under Yorkshireman James Cook)…….although they waited some 17 years before actually founding a colony. (Yes, it was a penal colony. No, that doesn’t mean that all or even many Australians are descended from convicts. Yawn.) Indeed, they did so only a matter of days before a French expedition under Jean-François de Galaup, comte de La Pérouse, arrived. A few weeks later and Australia could have been French…….

But those early colonists did something that Australia has consistently been good at. They worked hard; and then they worked harder still. And they grew. By 1859 there were six separate colonies which quickly assumed what is called “Responsible Government". Perhaps following the federation and Dominion Status of the Canadian Colonies in 1867, talk began of Federation in Australia, too, encouraged by the Premier of New South Wales, the Coventry-born Sir Henry Parkes.

Parkes never lived to see Federation (then as now political negotiations were difficult and slow) but with the dawn of the new century on 1 January 1901, the Commonwealth of Australia became the second independent Dominion within the British Empire, sharing a monarch but assuming the running of its own affairs.

There is a tendency to describe India as being the Empire’s "Jewel in the Crown". But for ordinary Britons, I’ve always thought that Australia really had this position. It was somewhere many of them had family, has always been one of the more familiar outposts of empire and – even today – is a place that seems to “matter” to the British public more than the others. (You can see that whenever the press gets its knickers in a twist about Australia becoming a republic. They never bothered about Trinidad or Malta doing that, for example.)

Australia’s growing up and rise to full independence was rather like that of a child going through adolescence and into adulthood, gradually gaining more powers but still helping mother when she needed it. And goodness me, did she need it in the two World Wars, when Australia’s sacrifice in the service of Britain was tear-jerkingly loyal. (I once had to admonish someone for saying that they “didn’t know Australia was involved in the war”. Idiot.)

Today, despite constant attempts to look more towards South East Asia and those periodic rumblings about becoming a republic, Australia still feels (take a deep breath and wait for the flaming, Ian) more-or-less British to me. It certainly has more in common with say Coventry than Kuala Lumpur or Birmingham than Bangkok. I do sometimes say (and this is true of Canada, too) that it’s like the best bits of Britain and the USA rolled together and with the worst bits of both taken out.

But it isn’t really about “which country is Australia most like"; it’s most like Australia.

The things that make me admire it so much?

The egalitarianism, above all. That you can rise to do anything irrespective of background or – as far as I can tell – money.

The concept of service to the public (which leaves the US with its “have a nice day” culture standing).

The bluntness of people in what they say (a very Jelf trait, that!).

And finally the one legacy of once being British which will endure long after Australia becomes a republic, changes its flag and stops over-cooking vegetables: that of Fair Play.

I could go on (!): Melbourne, one of the most beautiful cities on this Earth,; Judith Durham; Tim Tams; Paul Kelley; the Blue Mountains; the Whitsundays; Lamingtons; the ABC; Taronga Zoo and the Indian Pacific Train. But this Blog is already ridiculously long and I only sat down to pen a couple of paragraphs for Australia Day.

It’s been a privilege to visit it and we are always looking forward to going back.

Happy Australia Day

Those We Have Lost

2010-01-26T07:55:00.004Z

Today, my Dad would have been 77, had he not been taken suddenly from us nearly 14 years ago.

We have a tendency to eulogise those who have gone, putting them on pedestals and claiming that they were faultless and saintly. Well, obviously I’m biased but he really was like that.

He seldom talked about his younger years as – plainly unlike me – he had something of a disregard for the past, living for now and looking ahead. Equally unlike me, he was quiet, calm and often (though I didn’t realise it at the time) a calming, steadying influence on me. Everyone he met (and I really do mean this, too) liked him. I suspect my rating is somewhat lower than that!

I hope I share some of his attributes, though. He was limitlessly kind, very wise and above all “Good”.

I still miss you…….and Happy Birthday, Dad.

By a strange coincidence, Dad shared his birthday with his mother-in-law. She would have been 112 today!

I never knew her (or indeed any of my grandparents, which has always been a source of regret to me. My mother has always been very good at letting me about them all, though; again, something about which I’m very glad.

Amelia Green was born Amelia Smith, in Wednesbury. By all accounts she was one of those ladies who was always busy, not only bringing up six children but losing one of them in infancy. She was again very kind (and would give anyone her last penny), loud, determined, opinionated and always right.

There is something in this genetic make-up stuff, isn’t there? J

The Light Touch

2010-01-25T08:03:00.004Z

I had to put together a new floor and reading lamp for my mother-in-law yesterday.

Now although pretty large, this was no bargain basement affair, coming from Rackham’s (sorry “House of Fraser”) at a price for which I would want the house re-wiring.

Now I pride myself on not being at all bad with self-assembly furniture. I know the instructions can be, er, “vague” sometimes but I thought with a high-end item like this that surely wouldn’t be the case.

How wrong can you be? The instructions were in plain English and they didn’t seem to have been translated by Babelfish from Korean. They were just rubbish. They didn’t explain things clearly, they missed out vital pieces of information and indeed actual steps and the item itself has various nuts, bolts and washers already attached in (the wrong) place, a fact not mentioned in the “instructions”.

Some 45 minutes later, Louise and I were fixing and then unfixing various burnished brass poles, trying to work out how to thread wires and generally "discussing" with one another about the best way to do something!

When we next need a light (which happily we won't, as mother-in-law gave us her old one!), we’ll get one more cheaply from Ikea!

Sunday City People

2010-01-24T19:03:00.003Z

I'm used to being in Birmingham City Centre (or lots of other City Centres, to be honest!) early on a Sunday morning.

This morning, though, while waiting to meet a group to do a tour of Birmingham's famous Outer Circle 11 bus route, I found myself idly wondering what all the other people (and there were many) arriving in the City that early were on their way too. It was too early to be shop workers arriving for Sunday trading so who were they?

Was Birmingham getting torrents of other people arriving for witty, offbeat panoramic double decker tours with other witty, offbeat tourist guides?

Were they all hurrying to take up jobs in 24/7 call centres which used to be done overseas but which have now been relocated to Birmingham as our economy picks up?

Were they council administrative workers, eager to catch up on the backlog of things they couldn't get done when they were prevented from getting to work by the snows a couple of weeks ago?

Or was there some other more sinister reason?

I think we should be told!